All's Fair in Love and War |ATLA| |Reader Insert|

The Male Monarch of Omashu

Aang led all of you on top of a hill, early morning. He had dragged you to a new location.

"The Earth Kingdom city of Omashu!" Aang introduced. You looked at the temple-looking city.

"Sick," you replied blankly. You missed your sleep time last night and was extremely tired.

"I used to always come here to visit my friend Bumi."

"Wow! We don't have cities like this in the South Pole," Katara said.

"They have buildings here that don't melt," Sokka added.

"Well let's go, slowpokes," Aang said, "The real fun is inside the city." Aang jumped and started to run down the hill.

"Wait Aang!" Katara called, "It could be dangerous if people find out you're the Avatar."

"You need a disguise," Sokka stepped up.

"So, what am I supposed to do? Grow a mustache?"

~
Twenty minutes later, you plucked some fur from Appa and made a makeshift mustache and wig for him.

"Great! Now you look just like my grandfather," Sokka said, sitting on a rock.

"Technically, Aang is 112 years old," Katara stated. Aang picked up his staff and spun it around a few times.

"Now, let's get to skipping, young whippersnappers! The big city awaits!" Aang said in an old-man voice, using his staff as a cane.

"He's too good at that," you commented, barely keeping your eyes open.

~
The four of you walked across the earth-made bridge to the entrance of Omashu.

"You guys are gonna love Omashu," Aang said, "The people here are the friendliest in the world."

"ROTTON CABAGES?!?!"
The three of you froze.

"WHAT KIND OF SLUM DO YOU THINK THIS IS?!" The guard earthbent the carriage of cabages over the edge of the bride.

"NO! MY CABAGES!"
You looked over the edge, deadpanning at Aang.

"Just keep smiling," he said, continuing to walk. Katara nervously smiled at you and Sokka. You used your fingers to plaster a smile on your face. When Aang came close enough, one of the guards bent a rock over Aang's head.

"State your business!" He ordered. Aang zoomed up to him.

"My business is my business young man, and none of yours!"
The rock smashed into the ground right next to you from the earthbender letting it go. You were too tired to care.

"I've got half a mind to bend you over my knee and paddle your backside!"

"... hot," you said. Katara nudged you.

"Settle down, old timer," the guard said, "Just tell me who you are."

"Name's Bonzoo Pippenpadlopsicopolis the third," Aang replied easily, "And these are my grandkids." You walked up next to Aang.

"May Pippenpadlopsicopolis. I'm tired, let me in," you introduced. Katara then followed your lead.

"Hi, June Pippenpadlopsicopolis. Nice to meet you," Katara said. The guard looked down at you three, then pointed at Katara.

"You seem like a responsible young lady. See that your grandfather stays out of trouble. Enjoy Omashu." He moved out the way to allow you to through.

"We will," Katara said, the four of you beginning to walk forward.

"Wait a minute!"
You all froze when he addressed Sokka. He grabbed Sokka's shoulder and turned him around.

"You're a strong young boy. Show some respect for the elderly and carry your grandfather's bag!"

"Good idea!" Aang said, swinging his bag over Sokka's head. The walls to the city opened, allowing all four of you inside. When you walked to the interior, it was a huge delivery system.

"This is the Omashu Delivery system," Aang explained, "Miles and miles of tubes and chutes. Earthbending brings the packages up, and gravity brings them down."

"That's usually how gravity works," you said tiredly, just wanted to curl up and sleep.

"Great, so they get their mail on time," Sokka concluded.

"They do get their mail on time," Aang replied, "But my friend Bumi found a better use for these chutes."

~
And that's how Aang got all four of you into a carrier which was going down the correct course... until you made a few detours, like house shingles, a pottery, a mail carrier intersection, and finally crashed into a cabbage cart. Where you were greeted with guards. They dragged you to the palace where the Earth King was. All four of you were guided down to your knees. You were too tired to fight.

"Your Majesty," one of the guards said, "These juveniles were arrested for vandalism, traveling under false pretenses, and malicious destruction of cabbages."

"Not my direct fault for any of that shit," you muttered.

"Silence!"
Even though you were tired, you still scowled at him.

"The King can pass down judgement. What is your judgement, Sire?"

"Hmm..." The King scrutinized all of you. To be honest, you didn't care if you got thrown in jail. You just wanted to sleep. You were basically sleeping right there.

"Throw them..." The King began, "... a feast." Everyone exclaimed quietly in shock.

~
And that's how you were sat in front of a table with a shit ton of food. All of you were trying to wrap this around your heads. The King stood behind Aang's chair and looked at him.

"The people of my city have gotten fat from too many feasts," he said, "So I hope you like your chicken with no skin." He picked up the leg.

"Thanks, but I don't eat meat," Aang declined.

"I do." You reached over and grabbed the leg from the King's hand, eating the entire thing, including bone. The King blinked at you before coughing and walking away.

"Is it just me, or is this guy's crown a little crooked?" Katara asked.

"Nope, you're right," you replied, "He's crazy."

"So tell me, young bald one," the King said, "Where are you from?"

"I'm from... Kangaroo Island," Aang replied.

"Oh, Kangaroo Island, huh?" The King repeated, "I hear that place is really hopping." You glanced up at him with the most deadpan stare ever, even the pots and pans could feel it. Sokka then let out laughs. All three of you looked at him.

"What? ... it was pretty funny."
The King then yawned and stretched his arms.

"All these good jokes are making me tired," he said, slowly beginning to stand up from his chair. "I guess it's time to hit the hay." He suddenly threw a hidden chicken leg at Aang, who instinctively used his airbending to stop it. The guards gasped and you facepalmed.

"There's an airbender in our presence," the King said, sitting back down. "And not just any airbender--the Avatar!" You leaned over and smashed the chicken leg into the plate to stop him from airbending.

"Idiot...!" You hissed at him

Ja ne!

{Ruby Red}