Just A Kiss

Chapter 15: Caleb

I'm afraid to go in. What if AnnaLyn looks like my dad? Or worse?

I stand in front of the closed door that leads to AnnaLyns room. AnnaLyn, my best friend since preschool. AnnaLyn, the most beautiful girl I know.

I take a deep breath and open the door.

Her face is a little swollen and her arm is in a cast. One of her legs is propped up on a pillow, her ankle wrapped. Her cheeks are wet with tears.

At least she's awake. Alive.

Her eyes are closed. She must not have heard me come in.

"AnnaLyn?" I say, quieter then I intended. She opens her eyes, which are wide and afraid.

"Caleb?" Her voice sounds fragile, weak. She starts to cry again.

I walk to her bedside, pulling a chair with me and sitting in it. She covers her face with her hands like she's embarrassed.

I pull one of her hands away from her face and hold it in mine. "It's okay."

She shakes her head. "No Caleb. It's not. I was drunk. I caused the crash. I killed all those people."

I don't know what to say. Nothing seems right.

"Six people, Caleb."

I remember what my mom said in the car. Five people are dead.

"I thought there were only five?" I say and immediately wish I could take it back. That's not something I should say right now.

AnnaLyn just cries harder and shakes her head. "Caleb," she hesitates. "I was pregnant."

I'm temporarily stunned, my brain working to process her words. Suddenly, I feel a pang of guilt, though I didn't do anything.

"I'm so sorry." I say, but it doesn't feel right.

"I.. I hate myself. I wish I didn't survive." AnnaLyn says angrily, almost scaring me.

"AnnaLyn. Listen to me." She looks at her hands. I touch her chin lightly so that her eyes meet mine. "Look at me. You can't blame this all on yourself. It happened, so what? It was supposed to. God works in strange ways, AnnaLyn. And you were meant to live, and you will."

She briefly closes her eyes. "I want to believe you Caleb. I do. But.. I can't." She sighs. "I can't live with this."

My eyes search hers. The deep brown color puzzles me when I see nothing, no expression.

In a whisper so quiet I can barely hear myself, I say, "I can't live without you."

AnnaLyn sobs. I hate seeing other people cry. My throat tightens with emotion.

"I've looked up to you all my life." I say and AnnaLyn looks up at me. "Then you turned into... Someone that I find disrespectful and idiotic."

AnnaLyn squeezes her eyes shut. "I'm sorry... I don't know what happened to me.. I.. I don't even remember when I messed everything up."

I rest my head on our hands that squeeze each other so tightly that our knuckles are white.

"Caleb.." AnnaLyn says. I look up slightly, enough to see her eyes, wet with tears. Then, she whispers quietly, her eyes pleading with mine. "Tell me you still love me."

"Of course I do. Nothing can change that, AnnaLyn. Nothing."

AnnaLyn lifts her hand to my face, her thumb lightly brushing my lips. I want her. I want her so badly.

Her hand lures my lips to hers and I feel like I'm dreaming.

Her fingers play with my hair, lightly grabbing little pieces and twisting the thin hairs together.

My heart pounds. I feel like I'm floating, like my insides are turned out, in a good way. I touch AnnaLyns face, soft, even though it's swollen.

AnnaLyn sighs my name against my mouth, her lips fitting perfectly to mine.

Someone opens the door behind me, so I pull back, even though I don't want to.

"I'm sorry to interrupt, but I need to check AnnaLyns vitals." A nurse with a kind smile says.

"Go ahead." I say. Despite the fact that my dad is in a coma and the love of my life caused that, I feel giddy, happy.

"I'll be back, Anna." I say, walking out the door. I walk to my dad's room.

My mom is in the same spot as before, holding my dad's hand, a tissue in her other hand.

"Mom?" I say, quietly. She wipes her eyes with her tissue.

"Yes?" She barely looks at me.

"Any more news?"

She sighs. "Nope."

"When are we gonna go home?"

"I might stay the night. You can take the car." She looks at my dad again.

"Okay.. Everything's gonna be okay, mom." I say.

"I know, Caleb. I know." She says.

"Goodnight."

"Night."

I walk back to AnnaLyn's room. The halls are empty and quiet. The nurse is just leaving when I reach the room. She smiles at me.

I sit back in the chair next to AnnaLyn's bed and hold her hand. She looks tired, like she's struggling to keep her eyes open.

"Go to sleep, AnnaLyn." I say, kissing her on her forehead.

"Stay." She says.

I nod and get comfortable in the chair, our fingers interlocked.