Kabanata 23

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Kabanata 23

If I Have Nothing

My relationship with Rhett remained a secret to our family. Hindi naman sa ayaw kong ipaalam pero mas mabuti nang ganoon. They won't expect much on our marriage. Gusto ko lang maging komportable sa paligid namin habang inililihim sa kanila ang lahat.

We've had our few dates after my class. Hindi naman palagi dahil kailangan niya akong ihatid  at may klase pa siya hanggang alas sais. Then he'll practice for their gig and study for his classes. He had so many things to carry on his shoulders right now but Rhett still managed to balance them all well. Kung may oras kami minsan, I would review him on his upcoming quizzes.

It was the last week of October and it was already our semestral break. Mas nauna ang aming sembreak kumpara sa college kaya hindi ko na masyadong nakikita si Rhett. However, I would seldom go to their house because Tita Aleah wanted me to learn to cook other meals. Minsan ay tuwang-tuwa sina Mommy kapag natitikman na ang aking luto dahil para sa isang nag-aaral pa lang, marunong na ako.

It was the help of YouTube. Hindi ko naman agad matututunan iyon kung hindi ako nanunuod. I always watch whenever I have time. Minsan kapag kasama ko si Rhett ay pinapanuod ko iyon at itinatanong sa kaniya kung kakainin niya ba sakali mang magluto ako.

I don't expect Rhett to be the sweetest boyfriend. Given his cold nature, I know it's hard for him to even show me an ounce of his sweetness. Pero para sa akin, ang simpleng paghihintay lang niya o pagsama sa akin sa kung saan man ako magpunta ay nakakakilig na. Sweet words and flowers couldn't even equal the way he cares for me.

I don't really have an idea about his past relationships because all of them were in short terms. Palagi na lang may inirerekomenda si Kuya Boaz sa kaniya noon sa tuwing magb-break sila ng girlfriend niya.

Pero hindi naman kami mag-b-break diba? Although, I am younger than him and new to this kind of experience, I think I can maintain our relationship. Hindi ako nagiging makulit kapag ramdam kong magiging busy siya. I always understand that his time will be divided in different activities. Kung gusto niya lang naman ng suporta ko, nandoon lang naman ako.

It was really hard to keep what's going on between us. Si Marriam na nagtatanong at si Darwin na nag-oobserba, minsan ang hirap takasan. I told them that Rhett and I somehow like each other. Hindi na nagulat doon ang dalawa dahil halata naman daw sa tingin ni Rhett.

It was in the middle of November when my mother talked to me about my marriage to Rhett. Malapit na ang eighteenth birthday ko. My birthday falls on Saturday. Mauuna ang aking debut kaysa kasal. The different celebrations made my heart thump. I'll be eighteen and legal, at the same time, I'll be married.

Noon, iniisip pa lang na ikakasal kay Rhett ay hindi ko na mabuo ang larawan sa isipan ko. But now, with my good relationship to him, the image of me getting married to him became vivid.

"Wala ka na bang ipapadagdag anak?" tanong sa akin ni Mommy matapos kong mamili sa iilang magiging disenyo ng venue para sa aking debut. It will be held in a hotel owned by the Vasiliev's family friend.

Pumili na ako ng disenyo para sa invitation. The debut motif would be in red and white. Ang guests list ay hindi lalagpas sa 200 na katao dahil ang sabi ni Mommy hindi naman kailangang marami kung hindi ko naman halos kilala ang mga bisita. I've already written the guests that I wanted to be present on my party including Sister Martha and Juni. Kasama din sina Kuya Jax doon. I invited some of my classmates, karamihan ay ang mga nakasalamuha ko talaga at maganda ang trato sa akin.

Natapos lahat ng preparation last week lang ng November. I had this predebut shoot, ginanap lang sa garden ng aming bahay. They actually put a lot of Amaryllis flower in the house. As per my request, Amaryllis flower will be given to me instead of roses. Ganoon din ang mga bulaklak na ilalagay sa venue. The red and a mix of pink and white Amaryllis flower would be combined together to go with the color of the theme.

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