The Little One with Green Eyes

20: The Dark Lord's Wrath Part II

TW: SERIOUS GORE  (I'm not kidding, I went a little overboard)

-October 15 1991-
Sirius isn't ashamed to admit that he joined the Order purely out of spite. When Sirius was thrown out of his home, he vowed that he would do everything he could to bring shame to the Black family name (not that they needed much help with that) and hopefully, drive his mother into an early grave. So he'd run off with Jame's parents, a predominantly light family, had become an auror focused on fighting Dark Wizards, joined the Order of the Phoenix to fight against the Dark Lord that his mother loved so much, used his childhood home as the meeting place, even.

Yet, as the years passed and Sirius lost more and more to the war and his spite, Sirius found himself regretting a lot of things. The biggest thing Sirius regretted was listening to that old man when he told Sirius not to take Harry. Had Sirius just put his foot down, Harry would be alive and the Dark Lord wouldn't be so bloody obsessed with his precious godson.

Sirius had often thought of leaving the Order. He was an auror still, despite his involvement in the last war, but Sirius knew that if it got out that he was still involved with the Order, he could lose his job. Or even worse, he could be sent on a year long mission out of the country again. Somehow, though, he never really made any moves to leave the organization.

Now everything was changing. The Order was steadily losing its influence and power, and when the Order returned Harry to the Dark Lord, Sirius knew it was time to make changes. Sirius had sat in his room while Dumbledore gave his precious godson to the Dark Lord, his lover holding him as he sobbed. It was at that moment that Sirius realized, Dumbledore could not offer him what he needed.

At first, Dumbledore offered them a place to fight against the Dark Lord. When the Dark Lord won the war and the world changed accordingly, Sirius assumed that Dumbledore would have a plan to take back Wizarding Britain. (He didn't.) Over time, Sirius watches as the Order meetings grew less and less frequent while the information they shared grew less and less important and eventually, they were named rebels and outlaws to the public and whatever power the Order had, vanished.

The Order could no longer provide Sirius with the things he needed. They could not offer him protection---not whilst they ran from the law like rats hiding in sewers. They could not offer him family---not whilst they returned the last member of Sirius's broken family like he was nothing more than a package to barter with. No, the Order could not do what it promised, so why should Sirius stay?

It all came to a head, however, when Snape barged in and accused Dumbledore of ordering a hit against Harry. Even if Dumbledore denied it, the truth of the matter was simple: Dumbledore had a secret spy whom they all knew nothing about. Said spy attacked and attempted to kill Harry. No matter how you look at it, Dumbledore looks guilty. Pair that with the knowledge that Dumbledore left Harry in an abusive home and everytime Sirius tried to come for him, Dumbledore would step in along with Dumbledore's creepy obsession with Harry...

No, Dumbledore was hiding something. And Sirius wanted no part in it.

It was time.

"Remus." Sirius called from his comfortable place on the couch. He heard the rattling in the kitchen cease as his lover stopped making dinner to walk into the den where Sirius sat.

"What is it?" Remus asked, looking at him in concern. Sirius knew that he looked grim, but Sirius could not force himself to calm down and smile to ease his lover's anxiety. "What's going on?"

"We need to talk." Sirius said firmly.

"Not something you ever want to hear," Remus said with a nervous chuckle. He sat down in the armchair across from him and folded his hands into his lap. "What's going on, Siri?"