about a queen

till i forget

i don't want to know anybody anymore
instead i want to forget the ones that i know of
i want to forget all the things that made me jealous of someone
i want to forget the feelings i got when they left
i want to forget the teachers that insulted me unknowingly, knowingly
i want to forget my best friends from past and present
i want to forget the boys i used to like
the street i used to roam aimlessly, the classrooms that ate me of my pride, the afternoon my mom asked me to jump right in front of a truck, the times when i didn't study, the day mother threw the tv remote, the day she plugged out my phone, the answer sheet i left empty, the numerals under forty, the first boy in class, his blue crush, his guitar, the playgrounds, the picnic, the volunteering , the talk about fault in our stars with the friend, the friend who always said she didn't study and stood first, the children's day i spent in a washroom, the washroom mirror, the junior girls, the silent school bus ride, the teacher who sang, my first love, the boy who got a ninty-eight in maths, the boy who went to kiit, the awful trip to kolkata, the campus tour in jadavpur university, the bengali food in the restaurant, that ac room that cost so high, the sad journey back home, the fever i caught in train, the long list without my name, the wait in jgec, the toto ride back to our rented house, the sad look on my dad's face, the tooth ache, the root canal treatment, the wandering for a pain relief medicine, the rude salesman, the rain, the roommate with a boyfriend, the boat ride, the adventure to the palace alone, the long bus rides to tution at 5, the best nauseous best friend, the awful proffesors, the shaggy classmates, that dark optics lab, my intro in freshers day, that blue dress, the black saree, my introverted friends, the selection, the choosing, that migration certificate, freshers day speech, and doraemon song, and the anchor, and the poetess ali, their love story, psycho best friend, show off best friend, fake friends, badminton matches, him, the texts, the gifs, the committes, the writers, the wall magazine, the roommates, the warden, the seniors, the unwritten rules.
I hate everyone of you and everything i hadto go through . and I'll keep hating you till i forget you.