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Justin Bieber

"great shoot justin" the photographer smiled. i racked enough energy to give him a crooked smile. i felt like i was gonna pass out at any moment.

"jeff?" i called softly. jeff perked his head up from his phone and made his way towards me. i grabbed a hold of his shoulder and sighed. "can you get me a driver to my hotel? i feel sick" i mumbled.

"sure, give me a second-take a seat" he slowly helped me to the floor. "did you eat anything? the shoots over" i nodded my head no.

"i'm gonna get you a oatmeal, i'll call the driver"

i nodded my head okay because i couldn't even comprehend words.

////

as i sat in the car, holding my oatmeal my stomach was filled with disgust. i was so hungry that i couldn't eat anymore. i ate a spoon fill but felt like throwing it up.

once i got to my hotel i got a call from jason. i can't keep ignoring him. "h-hi jase" i said weakly.

"justin? are you okay?" he asked concerned.

"just really tired" i faked a yawn. i felt the room get blurry. i gripped my bed sheets to keep me balanced.  "i'm sorry jase..." i slurred before i fell down.

"justin!" i heard jason hell threw the phone before everything went black.

Jason McCann

i was scared. i never booked a flight so fast.  i was in miami in 4 and a half hours. i didn't pack a bag. i didn't charge my phone. i just jet here. i was scared. i was scared i was never going to hear justin again. i didn't know what happened. if he was hurt, or sick, or kidnapped. my mind was racing with situations.

i felt like crying and fighting at the same time.

i made it to his hotel room. i took him to the hospital. it felt so fake. everything felt so fake. i couldn't process what was going on. i just wanted to help justin. i just wanted to be safe. i just wanted to hold him and rock him. i felt like i failed him as a boyfriend. i should've came even though he told me not too. i just wanted to give him space.

"hello Mr.McCann" the doctor approached me.

"is he ok?"

"he will be, we got him on a IV. it seems like he's dehydrated and he is extremely underweight. is justin bulimic or anorexic? do you know if he has any eating disorders?"

" he starves himself. i think he has body dysmorphia...he thinks he's huge when in all actuality he's pretty skinny. i'm nervous doctor"

"this is a very severe case. we're going to keep him overnight to monitor and continue to treat him through the IV" i nodded. "You can come see him" she patted my back. i followed her to justin's room. "he'll wake up shortly"

"thank you" i sat in the chair next to him. i stared at the boy in front of me. is this my fault? i should've noticed. this isn't healthy. i want justin healthy and happy. i grabbed his hand and kissed it softly. "i'm so sorry baby boy" i sighed.

his eyes slowly fluttered open. i watched as he turned his head to me. "jase?m" he asked. he was pale, striped from his natural skin color. "what are you doing here?" he said slowly.

"i was worried. i heard you fall over the phone and i booked the first flight here-hence why my phone is dead" justin smiled softly at my last remark. "justin baby. do you see why i said what i said before you left"

he frowned and turned away. "this isn't the first time"

my eyes widened.

"it's been a while but this isn't the first time" he trailed "i really wanted to take a break jason, i really did" so why didn't he?

"but...i know i would get replaced by the time i come back..i have nothing jason. i'm not talented or smart. this is all i got. so i fuck this up...i have nothing else. i'll be broke and homeless"

i felt my heart drop. he has been carrying this around this whole time? "justin why didn't you tell me?"

"i didn't wanna scare you off"

"you aren't going to scare me off justin" he turned his head back to me. "your my boyfriend. we're in this together. i'm not gonna let you be broke and homeless baby" i grabbed his hand. "you're to beautiful for them to replace you- your health is more important than wealth."

"you think it's so easy jase...when you leave-"

"i'm not leaving-"

"when you leave" he continues "who will support me? i have no family, no friends, i'm all alone without you. i gotta support myself. i have no degree or even a GED...this is all i got."

i was at a lost for words. i understand why he was so overwhelmed. i felt horrible for him. the modeling world is not what it seems.

"i'll help you..i'll do anything to make you feel better" i kissed his knuckles. "just let me in jay. i need you to trust me"

"i'm scared...i'm.." he trailed. he looked tired. i think he fell back asleep. i sighed. how can i prove to him my loyalty? what should i do? how can he trust me?

how can he love me?

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