mother of wands (d.m) part two

XI

The months felt like years, each passing second seeming to drone on for eternity. I stuck mostly to the manor, refusing to leave Draco's side unless absolutely necessary.

Luckily, I wasn't asked on another mission again, snatchers taking over my role in finding and gathering information about the sands whereabouts.

My body ached from the tension of the past year, my shoulders constantly up around my ears as we navigated the days. I could barely eat, my stomach turning as my mind replayed Ollivanders screams in the cabin.

Regretfully, I didn't see much of Luna anymore but I was always kept up to date on what was going on with her. Draco would Weezy every few hours to make sure she wasn't hungry or in need of a listening ear.

She would politely tell her no thank you and return to pacing around the dungeon, asking only that she be brought bread in the mornings.

The plans to find Harry Potter and his group of friends were always thwarted, the four of them always evading capture by a few seconds. Secretly, I was happy to here reports that they were evading the snatchers, Athena's safety always at the forefront of my mind.

Life at the Manor went on mostly as normal, the outside world falling to pieces and we were nestled up in our fortress. I felt terrible that I was being treated like royalty while the rest of the Wizarding world was struggling to stay alive.

I devoted myself to being a part of every conversation, listening to plans and whispered conversations in hopes that I could use it against them one day.

To my surprise, Narcissa was my biggest well for information. She would drone on over dinner about dates and times of attacks, continuing to infiltrate the ministry or how Harry and Voldemort wands are connected.

We had learned about wandlore at Ilvermorny, but with everything that's been going on, I couldn't remember anything. I could barely remember what I learned while at Hogwarts, let alone something from a few years ago.

The Malfoy's had an extensive library filled with books on more magical subjects than I could imagine, but every time I sat down with one, my mind would glaze over, unable to process any of the words.

I felt stupid and defeated, how did I get allow myself to get here... How did we all get here?

I hardly slept, nightmares of Athena wondering the wilderness with Potter and his crew keeping me up. What were they doing out there besides hiding? Certainly, they were planning something and not just camping.

Whatever they were doing made Voldemort more anxious then usual, his pale grey skin getting worse, his cheekbones more prominent and his eyes surrounded by dark circles.

I had a hunch Draco knew what was going on but I didn't press him for answers, I no longer cared. I trusted Athena to do the right thing and when the time came, tell me about her adventures as I will tell her about mine.

Luckily for me, we stopped discussing when I was to take Voldemort to my mother. Ollivander's little rant about Grindelwald's family being mostly useless in the search for the Elder Wand must have had an effect on the Dark Lord because he no longer asked.

A part of me was relieved to have my mother mostly out of the picture but the small twisting in my gut persisted. Maybe Voldemort was already close enough to the Elder Wand that he didn't need our help anymore.

Still, we kept Ollivander locked away in the dungeons with Luna, only to be visited by the house elves. I guess a sick part of me had always known it would turn out like this: killing innocent people and torturing the ones we needed to keep alive.

Draco tells me to bottle my feelings for now, push them away into my little clouds until it's safe to release them. He does the same thing, a new stoic persona around the Death Eaters but breaking down when we're alone.

He and Narcissa call it 'Occlumency.' A word I had heard in passing before both at Ilvermorny and when Draco's mother found me in Borgin and Burke's. It was an elective for the 6th and 7th year students in America but I never got around to taking it. It didn't though because apparently, I was fantastic at occluding.

Draco, on the other hand, is not. He's been trying really hard to shelve away his emotions, but sometimes his act isn't good enough.

He tells me he's scared of how he'll be perceived when this all ends. Will people believe that he was working against The Dark Lord this whole time or will they ignore all the good he's trying to do and shun him? Even worse, how will he be able to go on with his life if we win?

What will the world look like with Voldemort in power and us standing at his side?

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