Heart and Home~ Edmund Pevensie

Chapter 11| Dead or Alive

Caspian looked at the Narnian expanse before him in utter despair. This was their place – his and Amelia's – but she was not with him. She was gone. He remembered their talk on the roof the day the Pevensies had arrived...

"But do you love him? Yes or no?"

"No."

He gave her a skeptical look, "Do you promise me?"

She nodded, "I promise. You're the only one who has even a piece of my heart."

Her statement seemed to invite him closer, "Only a piece?"

She nodded again, "Only a piece, Caspian. You have to work if you want to the whole thing."

He smiled, "I assure you, I plan to work day and night."

He had failed. He let her die. He didn't work hard enough to earn her heart... he just let her die. He wasn't oblivious – he had always known that she still loved Edmund, but he had always wanted the best for her. He didn't want her heart to break for Edmund, but he wanted her heart to yearn for his own touch, his own love. But he didn't help her get over the king, he only managed to get her killed. I should've kept her closer...

Caspian heard a rustle behind him and he turned to face his Professor, who he had been lucky enough to rescue the previous night. The bearded man sat next to Caspian and looked at Narnia with the same glimmer in his eyes that Amelia had – the glimmer of hope.

"Why did you never tell me about my father?" Caspian asked, breaking the silence.

"My mother was a black dwarf from the Northern Mountains," his professor began. Caspian was shocked. His professor had been Narnian all along? He supposed it all made sense now. It explained why Cornelius was so adamant on teaching Caspian the Narnian ways. "I risked my life all these years so that one day you might be a better king than those before you."

Caspian replied, "Then I have failed you." He thought of all the Narnians dying behind those iron gates. His chest clenched in pain and heartache.

"Everything I told you, everything I didn't, it was only because I believe in you. You have the chance to become the most noble confladiction in history: The Telmarine who saved Narnia."

The Professor's words left Caspian speechless, so he didn't reply. Instead, they both looked at the Narnian landscape before them. Caspian wondered if there was any hope left to save the Narnians, but as always, Amelia had given him the answer:

"You were born to be King, Caspian. Your whole life has been built on being ready when the time comes."

"That does not mean I feel ready to lead these people."

She sighed, "Perhaps the fact that you do not think you are ready makes you even more worthy than the proudest of Kings."

Peter POV

Peter stared at Aslan's portrait in front of him and wondered where it had all gone wrong. They came to Narnia to save it, but now it seemed he had only brought the Narnians and his brother and sisters a deep sadness. Edmund would hardly look at him anymore, but Peter understood. It was his idea that got Amelia killed. His plan had failed, and Ed was paying the hardest price out of all of them. Yes, Peter could see Caspian's grief, but he knew Edmund's was greater. Peter's little brother hardly spoke. It was as if he had faded away, and only his body remained behind – it was like speaking to a robot.

Lucy sat down next to him, and Peter was glad for her presence. At least one of his siblings could still stand him, "You're lucky, you know."

She asked, "What do you mean?"