The Kontrabida Series #2: LUMIERRE HELENA YURIKO (COMPLETED)

TWENTY - VODKA AND BAD DECISIONS

Monday.

I went to class. But unlike the unholy anger that coated my heart from the moment it happened that sustained me through saturday ang sunday, this time though, I am completely oblivious from everything.

Ngayon, winala ko lahat ng emosyon ko at inisip na wala akong kilala sa paaralang ito na kahit sino. I walked with my head held up high, my usual rude strut and an air of elegance that has always been shield everytime I am faced with a problem.

I went in class, sat on my chair and listened without ever taking my eyes off of the teacher. Wala akong galit.. dahil wala rin akong pakialam.

I saw Valeria sitting right next to the President just like how they always do. I saw her smiling at him, talking to him, touching him, like she fucking owns every single part of him.

But then, unlike before, I can't feel anything in my heart at all.. as if I'm in a blessed state of numbness.

"Veve, cafeteria tayo?" Nessi sounded so happy when she called to me after that first period. So happy that I knew exactly that she's trying to make me feel normal.

I am not.

I looked at her with dead eyes and stared. Nakatingin lang, at walang naging reaksyon. Alam ko rin sa gilid ng mga mata ko na nakatingin si President at Valeria at ang ilan ko pang mga kaklase sa akin, naghihintay ng reaksyon ko. Gauging if I am okay with everything..

"Lue.." Nag-aalala niyang saad. She came near and touched my arm in a way that was able to snap me out of my thoughts.

I blinked and replied. "No, thanks."

Kahit ang pagsasalita ko ay walang kaemo-emosyon. Na para bang tinanggalan ako ng kakayahang makaramdam ng kahit na ano.

Matapang na binalingan ko ang dalawang nasa dulong bahagi ng kwarto. Naghahanda na dapat sila na umalis pero nakakapagtaka na nananatili sila doon pareho. President was looking at me, while Valeria is looking at him, waiting I guess.

Hindi ko tiningnan si President. Nanatili ang tingin ko sa babaeng yun hanggang sa lumipat nga ang tingin niya saken. I saw her eyes widen when they met mine. Bumakas ang takot at pag-aalinlangan doon.

I wanna smirk. I want to feel. But honestly, I feel nothing. Iniwas ko na lang ang tingin ko saka bumalik sa tamang pagkakaupo.

The bell rang.

Umusog ang upuan, hudyat na may papaalis na mga estudyante. Muli ay bumalik ang tingin ko sa likod noong magsalita si Valeria.

"Luke, tara na. Malelate tayo."

Tumango si President pero hindi man lang gumalaw. "Sige na. Mauna ka na."

I saw her touch his arms to pull him up but he shook her off and looked at her with angry eyes. For a moment, I thought his eyes burned with anger, but then, it changed back to how it always was in a snap making me wonder if it was just my mind playing tricks on me. Napalunok si Valeria, at parang nag-alinlangan.

"O-okay. B-basta sumunod ka na lang."

Bago pa man bumalik ang tingin ni President sa akin ay naisaayos ko na ulit yung katawan ko at nakatingin na ako sa harap. Pumasok ang sunod na teacher at hindi ko na nasundan yung pag-alis niya.

The teacher gave us group works. Pinaghati-hati kami sa limang grupo, tag-lilima sa bawat isang group. For the first time, I payed attention to the class, and for the first time, I actually found out that studying is fun. Although, mahirap pa rin. I was so emersed in my thing when out of the sudden, the teacher called out.

"Mr. Lewis.. hindi ka pupunta sa next class mo?"

Nangunot ang noo ko at may biglang sumipa sa puso ko noong marining ko ang pangalang tinawag ng teacher.