Hope and Devotion (Chapter One)

Hope and Devotion (Chapter Four)

Ashe looked around at her and her husband's new bedchamber as Rasler placed her on the bed with the gentleness of a child handling their favorite china doll. He took a seat next to her, wrinkling the embroidered silk covers. She glanced almost wistfully up at the canopy of their bed, quietly waiting for her husband to make the next move. Her eyes closed as she savored the quiet stillness of the room. As much fun as she had had today, it was still good to relax.

"Enjoyed the evening?" he asked with a smile.

Her eyes fluttered open again, and she propped herself up against the plush pillows piled on the bed. "Yes, it was even better than I imagined… Everything was exactly how it should have been," she said dreamily. "How about you?"

She looked up at Rasler and smiled back. Despite her fears and mild apprehension towards the consummation of their marriage, it was the first time she was truly happy in months. With the threat of invasion on the horizon, there was little chance to enjoy life.

"Me too. The food was good, and the drink plentiful - and you were there by my side." He reached over and caressed her cheek.

"Why am I an afterthought?"

"You're not! Without you the whole affair would have been quite dull. I just thought a poetic pause before speaking your name would be appropriate." He rolled over onto his side and faced her.

Ashe felt the heat rise to her cheeks. She timidly disregarded the last bit. "I have a feeling that if I didn't attend, it wouldn't have started." Her hand rested on top of his.

"I probably wouldn't even be here," Rasler remarked, "I'd be stuck back home, listening to mother, or chasing after chamber—I mean, chocobos." He paused and stroked her jawline with his thumb. "I'm actually quite glad I married you." His lips brushed against her cheek.

"But we've hardly been married a day." She shook her head still smiling, and kissed him. His lips were soft and still tasted of sweet rose and almond; she thought of the ball, the ceremony, the wonderful food and sweet Dalmascan wine, their first dance, the swell of orchestral sound, how his eyes glowed at the altar. They parted, allowing her to deepen the kiss. Rasler pulled her closer still, closing the distance between them. She kissed him with all the passion she'd absorbed throughout that glittering night, and she could feel it tingling on his skin too. His hand brushed against her bare skin, and found one of the clasps of her gown. He pulled on it only to find that it remained closed.

He broke apart suddenly. "Let's finish this, after we change." He whispered into her ear, motioning to her dress, and to his armor.

"Sure," she replied, her face flushed pink. Soon, she was to give herself to her husband, and their marriage would be complete. With her innocence lost, the royal court would now see her as a woman. Ashe's hands trembled, as she sat up on the bed. "I'll be in my dressing room," she said, her voice wavering. She rose from the bed and vaulted to one of the adjoining rooms.

"Are you still nervous?" he asked before she could close the door.

Her eyes were downcast as she nodded; the fabric of her veil rustled. Her stomach twisted into knots.

"Come sit back down." He motioned to the bed. It was another attempt to ease her fears. She sat down next to her husband. "Tell me." His hand rested on the bare skin of her shoulder. It was electrifying; she wanted more and yet she feared the act itself.

She let out a sigh, "About everything." There was a pause, "If I end up looking like a fool, or if you find some fault in me, or if it's… just… not right..." She looked down at the royal blue woolen rug under the bed.

He held her hand, and gazed into her eyes, "We'll take our time, and I'll be gentle."

She looked down at her hands folded in her lap, nervously fingering all the little gems and adornments on her dress. "I guess we can try that. Sooner or later we have to…" She began to regret thwarting his efforts for intimacy, back when they were younger… Maybe if she hadn't, she'd be a little more… ready by now.