Unattainable Fruit

Excitement and Fading

Cody's POV

      Ever since last night, I've been very paranoid, it's like the beginning all over again. My anxiety is rising and I can't help the uneasiness in my stomach. Something keeps talking in my ear, telling me that today won't be what I want, but I try to ignore the thoughts, knowing it's only my anxiety messing with my head.

    This morning when James got me up, I was terrified at the prospect of going to school. Even if no one has seen the girl in a few weeks, that's doesn't mean she can't suddenly appear and do all the things she promised to me.

     I tried to tell James that I couldn't go back to school and I could just be a stay at home Luna and quit but he wasn't having it and neither was Jessie or Sloan. They told me I had to go to school since I missed so much and that I might regret letting my anxious thoughts and feelings get the best of me. And even though they were right, I wasn't a happy camper when I got into the car.

     I think James realized that when I turned my knees away form the middle console and towards the door when his hands come out to touch my thigh. He sighed to himself while Jessie called me rude, and returned his hand to the wheel.

    When we had arrived at school, he promised me that if I went through the day, that he would have a surprise for me today. The idea had instantly made me perk up, thinking it would be easy, but walking through the hallways now, I'm no longer thinking that's the case.

       I'm making my way towards the library for my free period and I run into Taylor and Enza on the way.

"Hey, guys." I say to them, raising my hand up to wave shyly and they turn their head in my direction before grins spread out along their lips.

" Hey, Cody!" Enza says in excitement before coming over to me quickly to pull me into a tight hug. I breathe and the smell of vanilla, always loving the way his scent calms my mind. He pulls back a bit before pressing his sticky lips to my cheek making me grin, knowing that it's his signature cherry lipgloss that Taylor loves so much. "I haven't seen you in a while. You okay?"

     I smile up at my friend, ever the worrier before I nod, avoiding his gaze. My eyes connect with Taylor who's standing slightly behind his lover and when he sees my burning cheeks he laughs.

       "Leave him alone, babe. He just had his Monthly." Taylor says and I groan in embarrassment as heat flies up my neck and face faster than before, hating the idea that he remembers when my Monthly is, even if he did used to have to calm me down from panic attacks.

        "Aw my little man is all grown up now." Enza says teasingly before pinching my cheeks and I give him a playful snap of my teeth making him retract his fingers and laugh.

         "I'm leaving now." I tell the two of them sticking out my tongue as I press my cool hand to my face in an effort to cool it down.

      "Don't be embarrassed Cody, unless there's something we shouldn't know about." Enza says to me and my mind flashes with all different sort so scenarios that he shouldn't know about. The thoughts hinder any effects I made towards getting my color back to normal and I do my best to hid it as I flip the two of them off and race away with a tomato face.

The bell rings but since I'm in no hurry I take my time as I make my way to the library. I open the doors a bit with the struggle with how heavy the wood is, and wave at the librarian who always shows me the best books to read. She gives me a kind smile and a wave back as I make my way towards the table that's in the middle of the room, placing my book bag on the chair next to me as I settle in.

I pull out my assignment for mathematics to do but my mind keeps slipping back to my times in the Baby Wing.

     Angelica and I have formed a special bond and the sweet baby has grown to like me very much. Claudia claims that I'm some sort a saint that came down to help her with the rowdy baby, but I just think that Angelica just needs a little tender love and care. I spend most of my afternoon and evenings with the babies in the ward helping Claudia in anyway I can and just spending time with the little beauties that make my day whole.