Ninjago One Shots [x Reader]

Father! Garmadon: Slang

-this is a really goofy story. It's just for the laughs, so don't take it too seriously

"Dad--"

"I was bouta throw hands."

"Dad--"

"And so, I asked her to spill the tea, but (Y/n) refused to. I deadass thought she'd get heated over it."

He didn't seem to hear you calling him from across the courtyard, nor did he show any sign of actually paying attention to your presence. Overhearing him gossip like a high school girl to Jay made you send Lloyd a look of confusion.

He knitted his brows and made a face at your father. "What's wrong with him?" You shook your head with a sigh. "I think he's trying to be cool."

"Uh, cool?" inquired Lloyd. You absentmindedly shrugged and made your way over to Garmadon. "Dad, are you busy?" He turned to face you with a warm smile. "Ah, I haven't seen you since this morning." he noted. You blinked, sending Jay an odd glance. "I think that wss because you..."

"Were flexing on my dear brother? I have to say, I've got better drip than him."

Your jaw dropped and Jay let out a laugh that echoed throughout all sixteen realms. "Dad." you said. "No, no. Please don't speak like that." There was a hint of pleading in your voice because, well, hearing a hundred-something year old man speak like a person your age didn't exactly feel right.

In fact, you were sure it caused a disturbance in the force.

As if reading your mind, your father said, "You're capping. My vocabulary is fire."

"Pfft--!" You glanced over your shoulder at Lloyd. He had a hand over his mouth, and as soon as he caught the gaze of Garmadon, he burst into a fit of laughter. Your father suddenly smirked, but when you narrowed your gaze on him, it was gone. Jay made his way over to you and clapped a hand on your back. "Isn't this great? Your dad sounds like us!"

You rolled your eyes. "No, he sounds like you Jay." Jay pulled you close to his side and gave you a good shake. "Oh come on, let him have his fun! He's highkey enjoying this." You gave him a pointed look that made him let out one of his weird laughs.

"Jay's right." your father cut in. "This is sending me."

Never had you wanted to dig your own grave and take an early rest in your own coffin.

---

By noon, your father was still going strong with the slang. He used it like his life depended on, and your friends, oh what traitors, liked it. They actually enjoyed seeing your father as a loose, trendy guy who instead of scolded people, walked around saying silly things like, "Alright boys, let's get this bread! We gucci?"

Your Uncle Wu, on the other hand, didn't quite understand what was happening. He questioned your dad about it, then you, but you shrugged it off with an embarrassed shake of your head. "He's...in a funk." you had said.

"A 'funk', you say?"

---

"I am so woke."

You rolled your eyes.

"Yassssssss!" Garmadon glanced at you, as if he liked to watch the distaste growing on your face. "You're on point--oh, nope. That was a big yikes."

At this point, he was just doing it to annoy you, wasn't he?

---

"Yeet that punching bag, son!"

---

"I'm so done with the weather today."

---

"Shook!"

---

"Sick!"

---

"Highkey!"

---

"Lowkey!"

---

"Bro, you just gotta dab on the haters."

---

The slang was getting on your nerves, and you weren't sure how much more you could take. Just how long until he stopped this madness and acted like his regular self?

At dinner time, you decided enough was enough. This was getting out of hand, especially since your friends and brother joined in on the 'fun'. "Okay dad and family," you heaved in a deep breath to centre yourself. "Would you quit the whole slang act? There's got to be a reason as to why you're...you know..." You made a motion with your hand and trailed off.

An awkward silence followed, but it trighered an odd reaction of smirks amoung your dad and familh. "She did better than I thought." he remarked.

"Better than what?" you snapped. Zane smiled and held out a hand in front of the boys. "It seems I'm the winner."

Lloyd sassily rolled his eyes, mind him, completely ignoring your question. "Zane always wins bets." Cole grumpily handed Zane a few coins. "That's because he's a nindroid. Whose idea was it to even place bets with him?" Jay shuffled around in his pockets, sending Kai a glare. "Who else? Because of you, I'm losing all of this week's allowance to Zane!"

"Hey, don't look at me! It was Garmadon's idea from the start."

"Oh come on Kai," scolded Nya, "why'd you have to give it away?"

Your gaze zeroed on the man only a few seats across the table. He sheepishly smiled, raising his hands in defense. "I was testing your patience, alright? Your friends said you've been having a problem with patience as of late, so I may or may not have been curious to see the extent of it."

You let out a long, tired sigh. "And you all were in on it?" There was a group of mumbled 'yes's' from everyone but Wu. He merely watched the exchange with a look of interest and awed confusion.

"First Spinjitzu Master," you grumbled, "why are you all like this?"