Maginoong Medyo Bastos

Chapter Sixteen

Vannessa thought of pain as vines that sprouted at the foot of an unsuspecting tree. The more the tree felt, the more the vines curled against it, clinging into its trunk down to the tiniest branch, securing it into a comforting embrace.

She'd like to think that she was also just a tree, and there were curls of vines around her that slowly became courage that led her in life. She'd like to think that she had turned the pain that she felt into something that could protect her. It was like she had made a fortress out of something that used to send her 5 meters below the ground.

Akala niya'y maayos nang ganoon siya kahit na maraming siyang nakababangga at maraming may ayaw sa kanya.. After all, she was still there, she had managed to stand back up again, she had managed to survive. She thought that it was probably because she had a shield that protected her against people whom she looked at as predators. Her prejudice had been her drive and protection.

Ngunit hindi niya alam kung bakit patuloy na nanginginig ang kanyang mga kamay na ipinagsilop niya sa ilalim ng mesa habang siya ay naghihintay kay Amanda. Hindi rin niya alam kung bakit labis na kaba ang nararamdaman niya habang iniisip ang mga bagay na nangyari na at kanya nang nasabi. Halos rinig na niyang pumipintig sa kanyang teynga ang bawat malakas na tibok ng kanyang puso.

Why was she nervous? It was just Amanda. Even when their last talk did not go well, she shouldn't feel that nervous for their talk, especially when she was the one who invited her over a cup of tea. It wasn't just her nature. She was someone who stood with her pride.

Napakagat siya sa labi bago humigit ng isang malalim na hininga. Nang itinaas niya ang tingin ay nakita niya si Amanda na nakatayo sa kanyang harap.

The girl smiled at her before taking the seat in front of her. The only thing that she could do was stare at the girl while her hands continued trembling. "I'm sorry if I'm a little late. Medyo traffic kasi at galing pa ako sa isang conference. It wasn't my interntion to keep you waiting," she apologized before flashing an apologetic smile.

Vannessa wanted to say that she didn't mind. She wasn't even paying attention to the time. Ni hindi niya alam na na-late ito nang isang oras sa labis na pag-iisip. Paulit-ulit sa isip niya ang lahat ng nalaman, ang mga sinabi niya kay Jax at ako espresyon sa mukha nito nang dahil doon. Naramdaman din niya ang pagsikip ng dibdib nang muling naalala ang sinabi ng binata noong gabing iyon.

"Have you ordered na, Vannessa? Shall I order for us?" Amanda asked, and Vannessa could only nod.

Nagtawag na ang dalaga ng waiter habang siya naman ay nanatiling nakatingin dito.

Setting all the preconceived feelings aside, it looked like Amanda was actually a decent person. Naalala niya noong unang beses silang nagkausap nang matino. Mahinahon ito kung makapag-usap at halatang may lubos na pang-unawa. Amanda was the picture of an empowered woman, and Vannessa felt worse for vilifying someone like her. Maybe her hatred clouded her judgment. She hated it.

She hated herself for treating Amanda as an enemy when she had been telling the truth.

Iyon ang isa sa mga dahilan kung bakit nakaya niyang tawagan ito at humingi ng oras mula rito. Since the moment she heard those words from Jax's mouth, a surge of guilt immediately pinned her down the ground. She felt like a criminal.

Ilang minuto rin bago siya nakapagsalita sa dinami-rami ng tumatakbo sa kanyang utak.

She raised her head to look at the girl. May tinitipa ito sa sariling cellphone at hindi mukhang kabado. Paniguradong ibang-iba sa estado ni Vannessa sa pagkakataong iyon. Humigit siya ng isang "Why did you agree on meeting up with me? Like I wouldn't even be wondering if you'd think I'd be plotting against you, especially after everything that I said to you," she said.