Just My Thoughts

I cried today...again :')

So yeah, I cried today. For no reason whatsoever, as always.

So what happened was, we were picking out partners for a group project today and guess what happened? I was left alone! Again! For the seventh time ever since I got in class eleventh!

To be fair I don't have any friends and I don't know anyone from the class in the first place.

I asked one of my classmates that I talk to if she would want to pair up with me and she agreed! But then her friend took her name when the teacher asked and I didn't want to make shit awkward between the two so I decided to do it alone.

So now I'm stuck by myself and I don't know what topic I'm gonna get so I'm scared.

Honestly, I was never a group kind of person. I've always been alone and liked to do my work on my own instead of depending on some person that I have no confidence over. It'll be better if my work had some consistency. What if I did a good job and the other person just half-assed it? Or I didn't do my work as well as the other person and it looks completely unrelated? So yes, I've never been a team player when it comes to group projects but I would appreciate it if someone would want to work with me, especially since higher class' projects are huge.

Now that I'm putting it like this I don't see the point in crying anymore 😆.

I mean as long as I remember, even when I am with a group of people I've always been an afterthought. Like "Oh! She's there as well!". So it's nothing new to me. Idk why I'm so upset about it now.