a rose by any other name

chapter two ❃ where it began.

By now the great hall was basically empty, all the food and dirty dishes had been cleared away- with magic of course- and all that was left now was a few people chatting quietly before they went to bed. I sat there pondering what to do with myself when I heard Weasley, Potter and Granger talking about something in hushed tones. Me being nosey, I moved into a seat closer to their table and listened closely. 

"I don't get why wont you just tell me what the hell happened when I was in that bloody hospital bed." Weasley moaned as his friends smirked at each-other. Potter opened his mouth to speak but Granger cut him off before he got the chance "I'm not giving you details Ronald, you would get too excited. All me and Harry are going to say" she glared at Potter, "Is that buck-beak and Sirius are safe and alive, they've gone into hiding but this MUST stay between us." Weasley's eyes widened and Potter began to talk. 

"Now that the truth is out about who really betrayed my parents and who was just trying to save them I'm sure the dementors are not the only dark forces after Sirius. We never got a chance to clear his name either so the Ministry are after him too... it's too dangerous for him here." Potter looked worried and Weasley smiled weakly "I am still so bloody confused but of course this will stay between us. Ugh why do i always miss the fun stuff." Granger laughed "You're too clumsy." Weasley's eyes widened again and he gestured towards his bandaged up leg. "Sirius mauling at my leg to get Harry's attention is not my fault." Granger and Potter laughed before they all stood up and left the Great Hall. 

I raised my eyebrows... that was information I of all people was not supposed to hear. Normally I would be excited to go and tell Draco what i'd just heard immediately but tonight i just didn't feel the need to for some reason, I felt like it was none of my business. Merlin what am I thinking? I must have eaten too much and its effecting my judgement, of course I was to tell Draco. We had all hated those three blood-traitors since our first day.

-Flashback-

We were all stood on a grand staircase in our school. It was absolutely magical here, friendly ghosts ran around the hallways, illuminated by the soft glow of candle's and the air inside the castle smelt like cinnamon and honey, my two favourite things. I looked around at all my new classmates but stuck to my new friends Draco, Pansy and Blaise. I had known Draco before Hogwarts but only because our parents were best-friends. Sometimes at dinner parties when we were younger, we would be shut in a room while the adults spoke about secret things, Draco and I never really spoke but that suited both of us.

So when he spoke to me at Platform 9 3/4 I was beyond excited to make a new friend, and he had even introduced me to Blaise and Pansy and invited me into their group. We had got to know each-other on the train ride here and I was relieved when i discovered that Pansy and Blaise were also pure-blood's.

Draco spotted someone in the crowd of students and scoffed, he walked over to them as Blaise, Pansy and I followed behind him. "It's true then. What they're saying on the train... Harry Potter has come to Hogwarts." Everybody around us gasped, including me. My parent's had told me all about Harry Potter; The Boy Who Lived.

"This is Parisa, Blaise, Pansy and I'm Malfoy..." Draco stepped directly in front of Harry and I revelled in the fact that he had introduced me first. "...Draco Malfoy." A ginger-haired boy standing protectively next to Harry sniggered and Draco glowered down at him. "Think my names funny do you?" He sneered, and the boy glared at Draco not saying anything. "Don't need to ask for yours... red hair and a hand me down robe. You must be a Weasley." 

Draco spat the name 'Weasley' with such disgust, I didn't even dare ask Pansy what was wrong with them.

The Weasley boy looked slightly hurt before he looked down at the floor and Draco turned back to Harry. "You'll soon find out that some Wizarding families are better than others Potter. You don't want to go making friends with the wrong sort." He looked back at Weasley now to support his point. "I can help you there."

Draco held out his right hand to Harry to suggest a friendship, for him to maybe even become one of our group. I looked at Harry and decided that he would be a good addition to our little quartet. Harry looked down at Draco's hand and then back at his face before speaking blankly, "I think I can tell the wrong sort for myself thanks."

--

Draco had been in a strangely personal conflict with Potter ever since then, he had completely humiliated Draco in front of our whole year. You wouldn't think that a denied handshake would have such an effect... although I cant imagine why he even wanted to be friends with Potter in the first place.

Pushing that disturbing thought to the back of my mind decided I would spend my night in The Astronomy Tower. 

I loved so many things about Hogwarts, like the hundreds of moving paintings and even just the atmosphere itself but The Astronomy Tower was definitely my favourite. I was truly fascinated by the stars and the moon, I also had a great fascination in the after life, I strongly believe that there is somewhere we go when we die, somewhere beautiful where you're with everybody you've ever loved and nothing bad can happen. 

Recently, I hated my name, I would never admit it out loud but I was starting to dislike being a Rosier, I just don't know if I really want to become a Death Eater. The more i thought about the more i realised what I would be sacrificing; my soul. Surely, selling my soul to somebody else, Te Dark Lord; ensures I will never go to that paradise I like imagine is waiting for me after death. 

Of course, I still agree with the Death Eaters and their views, although sometimes they can be slightly extreme, but do i really need to join them in that way? Not all of his followers became Death Eaters, in fact a very small proportion actually got the honour. The only thing I really liked about my name now was the fact that Parisa could be translated to 'like an angel" and call me vein but it made me feel rather pretty.

 By now I had reached the final step of The Astronomy Tower, I came here often to clear my head and stare at the stars, sometimes just wishing I could be anywhere but in this life. 

In my first year at Hogwarts especially, I agreed with my parents views so strongly. I believed that anybody who even associated with mud-bloods were traitors and deserved the same fate as muggles did. And, although now I still agree with this I cant help but sometimes wonder if i'm being too harsh. 

At the end of the day its blood and people with non pure-blood don't actually do anybody any harm. I've started reading muggle books. I found one in the library once and read it just out of pure boredom but two days later when i'd finished it, i'd actually enjoyed it. It was a tragedy, a love story. Romeo and Juliet i think it was called. Two people from enemy families falling in love and being together even when all the odds were against them. When they could be killed  just for being together, but they did it anyway. In the end they both died, a stupid mistake and lack of timing. They could have been together  if they hadn't have been so foolish. 

I often like to imagine what their story could have been like if they hadn't of died. They could have lived happily ever after. I had never believed in love, especially not love like that. I had always been focused on impressing my parents, working hard at school and practicing hard for the other things they wanted from me. But, I was young, and simply didn't have time to dream about love. 

However, imagining this alternative ending for the star-crossed lovers Shakespeare described has made me question pretty much all of my beliefs, all in the hope that maybe, on day, I will find my Romeo. 

I read that at the beginning of this year and now by the end of it I've read at least 10 more muggle books, all about love and being together against all odds. I long for a relationship, like Draco and Pansy have, an escape, somebody I trust and would go to the end of the earth for. 

I stare up at the stars wondering what it would be like to actually be in love with someone so strongly when I hear footsteps coming up the stairs. My cold demeanour returns as I wait to see who dare disturb my alone time. Why is anyone even up here its hours past curfew? I panic momentarily at the thought that it might be a teacher but relax when I see someone emerge from the stairs in their house pyjamas. 

He freezes when he see's me I assume because he must be thinking that I was a teacher also, but he relaxes slightly when he see's that its not. "What are you doing here Diggory?" I sneer.