Falling for my Sensei •• Kakashi Hatake x OC

Get a Hold of Yourself (Kakashi's POV)

"Are you sure you'll be okay tonight?" I ask Ari before I leave. I look at her.

Her eyes are a warm chocolate brown and they're full of secrets.

I can never tell what Akari is thinking. She's so good at throwing her feelings in an internal vault and locking them up.

Even if she wanted me to stay, if she felt sad or scared or lonely... she wouldn't tell me.

She never wants to appear weak.

She's told us a thousand times before, showing too much of your feelings is a show of weakness.

A little dark for a girl her age.

Seeing her cry that way last night was completely heartbreaking for me and very out of character for her.

The last time I saw her show any real emotion like that was when Kurenai passed.

She had a complete breakdown at the funeral. For a couple of weeks we couldn't pull her out of the mental state she was in. She spiraled.

The three of us were very worried and had no idea what to do to help her.

Then one day Iruka woke up and she was out of bed and making breakfast acting like nothing had ever happened.

"I'll be fine." She says giving me a small smile.

She reaches up and rubs her hand on my arm.

I want to stay with her.

Her touch makes me want to wrap my arms around her and carry her into bed, and never let her go.

In this moment everything feels different.

Akari is a grown woman standing in front of me and the feelings I'm having are not the usual ones I have for her.

I need to get a hold of myself.

I have to leave before I do or say something I can't take back.

"Goodnight Ari." I say with hesitation in my voice.

I want to stay with her.

"Goodnight Kakashi."

I step forward and plant a kiss on the top of her head. She smells like a mixture of strawberries and vanilla.
I could get completely lost in her scent.

I force myself to step back and walk out the door.

I hear her door shut and lock behind me and I walk to the parking lot of the apartment complex where Asuma and Iruka are waiting for me to see where we're going tonight.

"So what bar should we hit up? Emiko can't meet up with me until after her shift at Ramen Itchiraku. So I'm stuck with you guys for now."

"Why don't we just go to the corner bar. I really don't feel like going anywhere far tonight." Iruka says while texting on his phone.

I need a drink.

I'd like to drown out the thoughts that I'm having of Akari.

"Are you fucking kidding me?"

I look up at Asuma and follow his gaze to where he was looking across the parking lot.

Shikamaru.

He's going to Ari's right now? My stomach feels tight and a not so familiar feeling fills my chest.

Am I jealous?

"She kicked us out to get laid? When did we give her permission to have sex anyway?" He looks at us in disbelief.

"When did we agree she could have sex?! She just started having sex one day and we were okay with it?"

I put my hands on my face and try to rub my irritated expression off of it.

"We don't have to give her permission Asuma. She's a grown woman. Besides she's smart. She won't do anything stupid." Iruka tries to reason with him.

"She already is doing something stupid. It's my student that just walked to her door." He snaps.

"You know Shikamaru is a good guy. We shouldn't be worried." Iruka says.

But I can hear that his tone isn't as confident as his words.

"It's not our business." I say flatly.

They both look over at me.

"We were having sex at her age. Younger even. Who are we to say anything. I don't want to talk about her sex life anymore anyway. I need a drink."

I start to walk away from my friends in the direction of the bar.

I hear the click of Asuma's lighter as he lights up a cigarette and they both jog to catch up with me.

"I need a strong drink." Iruka says once he catches up.

Asuma and I just nod our heads in agreement. And we walk the rest of the way in silence.