I'll never hurt you - Jensen DDM

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Growing up you were never able to express yourself, growing up in a controlling, manipulative household, your father always had control over everything, and whenever you'd complain to your grandmother who lived with you she'd always tell you the same thing 'The man in your life always has the say over you' or the most used saying of hers 'Put some pants on your father and brothers are home'. You hadn't seen your biological family for a few months now, ever since the conversation you had with your doctor about needing help to get out of the abuse. Danneel and Jensen Ackles had been introduced in your life a little bit after you were placed into foster care, and not only did you have to adapt but so did your adopted parents. They couldn't raise their voices in an angry way around or at you, they couldn't rush toward you or trap you in a hug, it always caused panic attacks. 

Today you were out with your friend, Allison, she was a sweet girl, black and green hair, and she always had the clothes you adored. She had gotten the idea to give you bangs and to give your normal h/c a bit of color, nothing crazy just a soft pink color, You were of course nervous that Jensen would freak out and lock you in your closet for the night, you tried to shove those thoughts away so you and your friend could have fun but the closer you got to your new home you started to get anxiety and the panic started to set in. Cliff looked back at you and frowned "Y/n?..Are you okay sweetheart?.." He asked quickly seeing the tears in your eyes and your breathing picking up, noticing the signs of your oncoming panic attack he parked on the side of the road looking back at you "hey look at me okay? you're alright...I'm right here..nobody is gonna hurt you, hun..do I need to call Jensen?.." he asked "No!" You yelled/sobbed, Cliff jumped back a bit before looking at you closer "Y/n...Does Jensen hurt you?.." He asked softly, you shook your head quickly as you tried to calm yourself, tapping your fingers counting them slowly, once he made sure you were okay Cliff pulled back onto the main road continuing his trip to The Ackles home. 

Whenever you got back home your anxiety was skyrocketing, your hands were shaking and you were feeling very light headed. Just your luck Jensen was standing in the kitchen talking with Jared and Misha about the newest season, you tried to speed up whenever you passed the corridor but he had seen you before you could make it past "Hey, come ere" he said doing a small come here motion with his finger, you slowly walked over holding your breath waiting for him to start calling you names "What's this?" he asked smiling softly, happy that you were taking control of your life day by day, you couldn't see that happiness though, your eyes were trained on your shoes and his socks, Jensen held your freshly cut and dyed hair, he slowly pulled his hand away grabbing his phone from the counter, almost immediately as you saw his arm go back you flinched covering your face trying to step back only to fall back "I'm sorry!" You yelled curling up to shield your stomach "hey, hey...y/n look at me...it's okay sweetheart..I'm not gonna hurt you..nobody here is gonna hurt you okay?..I'm gonna grab your arm and help you up okay?.." Jensen said calmly to you, your breathing picked up as he gently grabbed your upper arm helping you up, slowly and gently Jensen held you to his chest rubbing your back "It's ok..it's okay..hey I like your hair..it's pretty and it shows how strong you are..did you pick that color?.." He asked trying to convince you that you were okay and everything was okay. You slowly nodded looking at him "I-I wanted to go with a-a little darker f/c b-but I didn't w-want to make you mad..." You whispered shuffling on your feet quickly "Hey..Deep breaths..you're okay..deep breaths..you're okay.." he repeated as he rubbed your back "Maybe we can get a hair appointment so you can have f/c hair..how does that sound?.." Jensen recommended making you smile and nod a bit "R-Really?.." You whispered looking at him hopefully. "Of course! Sweetheart..It's your hair, your body..your life...if you wanna...shave your hair off and wear whatever clothes you want go ahead..I just ask that you don't sleep with anybody until your at least seventeen..maybe sixteen.." He said cupping your cheeks kissing your forehead gently. 

"Thank you" You whispered your voice cracking as you hugged him tightly, Jensen's shirt slowly got wet the longer you stood there and cried, you were happy though, full of relief, you had finally gotten out of your living hell, you can finally be free and have control, you felt like you could finally breath. Your father held you encouraging you to let it out and express your feelings. Jared and Misha kept quiet not wanting to ruin the moment, remembering Jensen explaining how to act around you the first night you were at his house.

That night you were finding it very difficult to stay asleep, your mind always twisting your dreams forcing your body to wake up with fear and adrenaline. After the third time you were forced awake you got out of bed walking around the house, the light in the family office spiked your curiosity. Slowly walking in you saw Jensen staring at the script in his hands, tears going down his face "Jensen?....are you okay?" You asked, he jumped once he heard your voice quickly wiping  his face glancing at you "Yea, yea I'm okay, what's up hun?" He asked sitting up straighter "Well come on..let's go watch tv until we pass out, yea?" You smiled nodding towards him jogging towards  the movie room.  

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