Session 14.1

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defenceless | louis tomlinson
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I SNEEZED.

Before I could recover from it another followed, making drops of moisture and possible pathogens fly out of my mouth.

It always came in pairs. The sneezes.

I grabbed a tissue and then placed my phone back next to my ear. "Mom, I am really fine," I said.

"Baby, you don't sound fine. Let me come there and take care of you," she replied, worried.

"It's the usual flu, Mom. You know I get it everytime the weather changes." I sniffled into the tissue and chucked it into the bin I had nearby. "Besides, Kiara said she will be coming home to check on me soon and I also have Leo for company."

Leo was busy licking his paws and skin, trying to groom himself. I sighed, realising it has been more than two weeks since I gave him a bath. But the amount of energy I might need to calm him down before I made him sit in the bathtub, made me tired just thinking of it. Leo was a very neat cat so I procrastinated. I scratched his neck affectionately but he swatted my hand away.

"If you need anything at all, call me, baby. We are going to drop Luka and Laura at the airport," she said.

"Okay. Give Jamie a kiss for me. And say goodbye to both of them, Mom. I don't think I can–" I sneezed and soon another followed.

"Take care, baby," she said and hung up. I wiped away the snot from my nose and sunk under the bedsheets.

Two days had passed since Stacey's wedding. I didn't get the chance to send her off to her honeymoon because they had left early the next morning. She left me a note though.

Was very satisfied with how my wedding went. I am sure you are as well. *wink wink*

~Mrs. Gardiner.

Yes, I was indeed very satisfied that day. The day had been perfect. My parents had visited, I had watched my best friend shine the happiest, had great food and even though my ex tried to make me lose my cool, Jayce had stood up for me. He wanted to prove Gale wrong and that flooded my heart with love for him.

And the rest of the night was just... indescribable. Jayce was very confident. That might have been fueled by the urgency and the desperation for both of us to feel each other completely but it simply made me fall in love with him more. His skin against mine, his heartbeat syncing with mine— just two souls without barriers. The way he murmured in-between, all the low-voiced curses, and his touch... damn, it left me wanting more and more.

In the morning, I had woken up tangled in his arms and I swear I had been the happiest in two months. He kissed me again and when he dropped me in my apartment, he pressed another kiss to my forehead. But there was no label to what had happened between us, nor any type of discussion that went down. I hadn't told him how I felt and I didn't get the chance to ask him about his feelings as well. It was as if we pushed that conversation to later.

I wished we hadn't.

Jayce didn't call me or text me the whole day. The next day was blank as well. I could see that he was online and I even caught him typing once but no text came. Nor did he call.

I was very confused as to what to do. I wanted to call him too but I was nervous as hell. Very often, my fingers hovered over my keypad but they never made it to typing out the perfect message. What if Jayce dismisses what happened as merely nothing? I can't survive that type of hurt. I didn't want to go looking for a hole to fall into.

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