Jeremy: I just undiagnosed myself with stupid. I know everything now.
~~~~~~
Toy Chica: Somewhere, somebody out there is thinking of you and the tremendous impact you made on their life.
Toy Bonnie: Awe...
Toy Chica: It's not me. I think you're an idiot.
~~~~~~
Springtrap: Michael, I'm very disappointed in you.
Michael: Your approval means nothing to me.
~~~~~~~
Fritz: When I get murdered can you make sure I’m an unsolved case?
Jeremy: What?
Fritz: I want to be on Buzzfeed Unsolved.
Jeremy: Can we go back to the part when you said “When I get murdered”?
~~~~~~~~
Michael: What do you guys want?
Funtime Freddy: McDonald's.
Bon Bon: Wendy's.
Funtime Foxy: Mexican food?
Ballora: Chinese food.
Baby: Death.
~~~~~~~
Mike: fuCK OFF BONNIE-
Freddy: Mr. Schmidt, do you have a death wish?
~~~~~~~~~
Toy Bonnie: I take orders from one person. Me.
Marionette: It's a wonder you're still in one piece.
~~~~~~~~
Golden: Whoops.
Freddy: Whoops? WHOOPS? This is not a “whoops” situation. We are far past whoops. Whoops is a distant speck in the rear view mirror. We are solidly in “oh fuck” territory, and I expect you to act like it.
~~~~~~~
Shadow Freddy: Introducing a new alignment: chaotic lawful. I have a strict moral code, but no one can figure out what the hell it is.
~~~~~~~~
William: *pulls out a knife*
Henry: Oh no.
William: *opens box with the knife*
Henry: Phew.
William: *pulls gun out of the box*
Henry: Oh no.
~~~~~~~
Bonnie: If this is about those stupid Tamagotchis, you left me with six of them, Chica! Taking care of that many is like a full-time job!
Chica: I left you with six adult Tamagotchis in perfect health, and by the time I came home, they were all dead. You have to like, ACTIVELY murder them in order for that to happen!
