Much More

You & I

ROSMARY AND THYME - Novigrad

It was almost a midnight but in the whole Tavern was a big quiet. Jaskier closed it because of Geralt. He wanted to give him at least some rest without music when he couldn't help him differently. Yennefer stayed in Geralt's room almost a whole day. He started feeling better but he was still very weak. She was sitting on the chair next to him and her eyes started closing. Geralt suddenly murmured something and she came back to the mind and quickly opened her eyes. He looked at her.
"You're awake." Yennefer smiled at him and softly caressed his face.
"And you still here.." he smiled.
"Well.. I wanted to be sure if you're not gonna die at any minute again.." she laughed a bit.
"I'm glad you stayed." Geralt squeezed her hand.
"Are you okay?.. Not that I care.." she lowered her eyes.
"I know that's not true.. I think you care a lot.. I've just been too blind to notice.." he told her honestly.
"Yeah.. I thought that is something between us.." Yennefer admitted.
"Yen.. you're not delusional. There is a connection between us.. it's always been." Geralt was determined.
She smiled at him and then she hugged him tightly. He sighed painfully.
"That hurt.." he laughed a bit.
"Oh.. I'm sorry, I didn't realize it.." she wanted to pulled away from him but he stopped her.
"It's okay. This kind of pain doesn't bother me at all.." he smiled and pushed her closer to him. She kissed him on his cheek and snuggled closer to him. He wrapped his arms around her. He never wanted her to let go.
"You really scared me Geralt." she said honestly.
"I know and I'm sorry." he admitted and caressed her back.
"You could die." she slowly pulled away from him and looked at him seriously.
"I know." he looked into her eyes.
"But you did it anyway.." she was confused about that.
"Yes. And I would do it again and again.. Don't you know that Yen?" Geralt told her honestly. She gave him surprised look.
"I.. Thank you.." she said kindly. He nodded. He couldn't let her eyes from her. She took a deep breath.
"I wanted to ask you something since you.." she hesitated. This word was really bothering her mind since he told her this.
"Go ahead." he said calmly.
"I.. when you saved me, I asked you why you did that and.." she hesitated again. "And you said something about family... What did you mean by that?" she was confused.
"I told you the truth Yen." Geralt's face was calm.
"But.. I.. I.. how can we be a family?" she was trying to act strong in front of him but deep down inside her this topic was literally killing her. "I mean we're not even married.. and family also mean kids.. and.." he interrupted her.
"We are a family. I know it sounds strange for you but it's a truth." Geralt looked into her eyes. She gave him confused look. She was trying to understand his words but nothing made sense to her. All that he told her cannot be true. It was impossible and she knew it.
"No.. no, that's not true. I can't have my own children.." she started to be irritated.
"I know you can't have a children but we have them.. We.." she cut him.
"Why are you messing with me Geralt?" she raised her voice and stood up from the chair.
"I'm not messing with you. You just don't understand it because.." she interrupted him again.
"Because of what?" her eyes were on fire.
"Because you have an Amnesia." he straightened himself in the bed. He wanted to have a better look on her.
"You're unbelievable.." she shaked her head. "For the first time I almost believed that you really care, that you care about me.." she was disappointed.
"Yen, please let me explain everything.." he looked at her worriedly.
"There's nothing to explain Geralt.." she was holding her tears. She couldn't believe it. After everything what happened between them he did it again. He let her down. She then turned around and started leaving from the room.
"Yen! Wait!" he shouted on her. But she didn't stop walking away.
"Fuck." he sighed. Then he managed to sat down on the edge of the bed. His whole body was in the pain. But he had to do this. He had to do this for her. Then he stood up and sighed painfully. He immediately saw a stars everywhere. The pain was unbearable but he was not ready to give up on her. Then he slowly started walking towards the door.

He find her in the main room. She was ready to leave from the Tavern.
"Yennefer, wait!" he shouted at her. She stopped walking. She wasn't sure if she wants to see him again. She wasn't sure if she was ready to let him break her heart even more. But she still cared about him and she also knew that he came after her despite that his whole body was hurting like a hell. She took a deep breath.
"Please Yen. I know that deep down in your heart you want to hear an explanation." he said sadly. She turned around and looked at him with pain in her eyes.
"No. You know nothing Geralt. You don't know me.." she stated.
"That's not true.. I know who you are Yen. Just stop pushing me away and I will show you." Geralt was trying to persuade her.
"If I would betray you in the first opportunity because something would be more valuable for me or I let you kill you just to save myself because I am selfish, would you want me then? Would you still trust me? Would you tell me to go fuck myself?" she looked at him questionable. She wanted to know it. She wanted to know if he is the one who she once thought he is. Geralt looked at her worriedly.
"No.. I'd tell you I'm right here. Not going anywhere... Look if you really think that I wouldn't forgive you for your mistakes or your flaws, if you think that I don't know who you really are by now, you're wrong." he risked it. He knew he could ruin everything with those words. But he had to try it. He had to show her that he cares about her. She gave him surprised look. She didn't expect these words. She expected everything but not this.
"Fine.. Then tell me the truth or a very good lie because I can't stand it anymore.." she said without emotions. But the truth was her heart was screaming from the pain and she didn't know how long she can handle to act strong.
"You don't remember anything but.." she interrupted him.
"I told you something Geralt." Yennefer warned him.
"I'm telling you the truth Yen. We're two are really together and we are a family. I was trying to tell you this but I didn't know how. I was scared that you wouldn't understand." he lowered his eyes.
"You're right, I really don't understand.. I don't understand how I could have a feelings for somebody like you.. I mean, I really liked you.. but you're just a liar Geralt and right now you're hurting me.. a lot." she said with pain in her voice. She couldn't hide her emotions anymore. Geralt looked at her sadly.
"So, please just step outside and get some air.." she stated.
"But I don't need air.." Geralt was confused.
"Well, I do.." she looked at him frustrated.
He opened his mouth to say something but in that moment Jahve entered into the room and Triss followed him right after. The situation couldn't be more worse, Geralt thought.
"Mum!" Jahve called on her when he spotted her. Yennefer frozed in that moment. She looked at Jahve with fear in her eyes. Geralt lowered his head. He knew what was coming and he didn't want to watch this.
"Jahve don't." Triss stopped him with his hand when he was ready to go after her.
"I want to go after her!" Jahve wanted to escape from Triss. "Please..!" he started crying. Geralt raised his head when he heard that his child was in pain. Triss raised him to hers arms. She looked at Geralt. He nodded. Then she started leaving with him from the room.
"No.. Triss please.." Jahve was crying so loudly. "Mum..!" his tiny voice failed him.
Yennefer couldn't even move. These words were too much on her. She slowly turned to Geralt.