A court of Shadows & Blood (An ACOTAR / Azriel fanfiction)

Chapter 12

I woke up with a deep ache in the pit of my stomach and the first thing I noticed was the thick fog outside the window.

I blinked for a few moments, feeling a strange tingling on the side of my face, until I remembered the scar that now adorned my face. I tried to lift my hand to touch it but it was immediately bought to my attention that I couldn't move it.

Memories of the last day flooded in and I sighed.

Lucifer, Alcina, The Ideosy, Cassian, Rhysand......and Azriel.

He slept peacefully by my side, his luxurious lashes resting upon his cheekbones. His chest rose and fell in rhythm with our fingers entwined and my hand against his heart.

I propped myself up on my elbows, knowing that I might never get to see him so peaceful again.

His thick, dark hair spilled over the pillow like secrets. I gently kissed his hand that was holding mine, so as not to wake him.

Surprisingly, his shadows were nowhere to be seen. They no longer shielded him from anything or anyone. It was just the two of us, completely bare and vulnerable, and in that moment I wished the time would stop and I could just stay there by his side, for as long as he would have me.

It didn't last long however, for the spymaster was not useless without his shadows.

"Stop thinking about leaving, will you?" His raspy voice bought a smile to my face.

"I'm not." He pressed his mouth to mine in a lazy kiss and my brain turned into a mush at the tip of his tongue.

"You are." He pulled away.

I sighed, tracing one of the scars on his hand. "You stole the devil's bride, Azriel. They will make sure you pay."

He pressed his body against mine and I inhaled his addictive scent. "There is no price I wouldn't pay for you." He kissed the top of my head.

"There is no way out of this." I said with my face in the crook of his neck.

"Then I go down with you." He shrugged.

"What?" I pulled back, horrified. "No. You have a family. People who love you more than life itself. I'm selfish, but not selfish enough to take you from them. If you don't want to live for yourself, you have to live for them. Live for me. Take care of Alcina after I'm gone."

"She destroyed half of the townhouse and cussed out all of us while poisoned, I think she will be fine without me." He supplied.

"I know. I-" I struggled to find the right words to explain to him that I always knew I was going to bound up in hell. I never hoped for anything, much less someone like him.

I never thought someone would look at me like I was the very centre of their world. I never had time for it. I never thought someone other than my family could care about me.

I knew, of course, that I would leave a void in Alcina's life. But I also knew that she would find people who loved her, perhaps, even more than I did. It was hard not to love her.

The only thing I had ever been sure of was that if I was going to hell, I will drag The Ideosy down with me.

"You don't understand. " I gave up at last. "I don't even know why you came this time."

He frowned. "You can't be that dense, can you? Of course, I came. I still haven't tasted a single dish that you love to boast about."

My jaw dropped. I stared at him and when he didn't stop frowning on his own, I smacked that frown off his face.