Sunken ships

7

"Tommy? Hello! How nice to see you again." He says in a calm way. He doesn't seem to notice how nervous I suddenly am. Am I dreaming this? How can he be here right in front of me? I can feel my face become red and my hands are getting sweaty. 

"Euhh I- I need to get going," I say with a shaky voice.

"But wa-" I didn't let him finish his sentence as I turned myself around and made my way home.

Did I really just see him? Did he really just talk to me? Why was I so nervous? Why didn't I talk back to him and just walk away?

When I reach my front door I feel that I am a little out of breath as a result of the speed walking from the market to my house. I turn the cold door handle so the door opens and I can walk in. I take my keys and wallet out of my pocket and throw them on the small table in the hallway. While I kick my shoes off and hang my coat on the coat rack on the wall I realize I am very rushed.

I walk into the kitchen with the bag from the market with only a couple of things in it. I only got a loaf of bread and five carrots. I put the carrots in the refrigerator and the loaf of bread on the countertop. I still need to get fruits from the market and maybe I could use some herbs too. I will go back another day. Maybe now for dinner, I can make carrot soup and some bread with butter to go with it. 

After dinner, I wash my plate, bowl, knife, and spoon in the sink and let them dry on the countertop right next to the sink. When that is done I proceed my evening in the living room where I am reading the book I started reading a few weeks back. It's quite good if I say so myself. 

As I take the book in my hands I repeat the title of the book in my head a couple of times. For Whom The Bell Tolls by Ernest Hemingway.

Once I have read another thirty pages I feel myself getting tired. So I decided to end my day and go to bed. In the small bathroom, I brush my teeth, go for a wee, and stroll to my also small bedroom. There I put on some nightwear which is light blue with thin red stripes on it. I wrap myself in the duvet and make myself comfortable ready to go to sleep. 

Sunday, May 2nd

The next morning I get myself ready, get the milk at the front door and eat some breakfast. Just a slice of bread with cheese on it and a glass of milk. I place my plate, knife, and glass in the sink. I can do the dishes another time.

I wash and dry my hands and walk into the living room. I make my way to the corner of the room where my record player is. After looking through my records for a minute I chose the album of the Andrew Sisters. I take the vinyl out of the packaging and place the vinyl on the record player. Placing the needle on the record is always tricky so you have to do it with precision because you do not want to ruin your vinyl.

After I have done all that the record starts turning and the music begins to come out of the horn which fills the room with the melodies. I instantly recognized the first song, It is As Time Goes By.

You must remember this
A kiss is still a kiss
A sigh is just a sigh
The fundamental things apply as time goes by

I really like this song. It's the kind of song where you just can not stand still even if it's just little movements. So I am just in the living room filled with the song while I dance a little. I love letting my body move to the melody of those songs, I am a real ducky shincracker. I feel so free at those moments, it makes all your worries go away for a moment.

As the song is now halfway my eye catches a glimpse of the journal on the coffee table in front of the couch. It reminded me of what happened yesterday. I kind of forgot about it or I want to forget about it. 

I go and sit down on the couch with the journal now in front of me. There is a little bit of hesitation to take it and continue writing. But what do I have to lose? So I take the notebook with the ballpoint pen. Those pens are actually something new, the ink is inside the pen. They are very handy although they do stain the paper sometimes.

Now that the journal is in my hands I take the string that is around it with my left hand and pull open the string. I place it down next to me and open the notebook to where I left off.

All the men, including me, got off the train at the station. All of us were still surprised by all those people on the platform. We expected nothing like this. We imagined disappointment and disgust. 

We were still not proud of ourselves. I still had the idea that we were a disappointment to our country. We fled, not fight back.

So we were all standing there with all the people cheering around us. A few of them hugged the soldiers who came home. At that moment I realize that Alex isn't standing next to me like before. He is standing a bit further up the platform talking to a middle-aged couple. The woman wearing a light blue dress was a little shorter than the man in a light brown suit. I assumed those people were Alex's parents.

Alex seemed very happy and relieved to be back home and with his parents. I really wanted to say goodbye one last time but I was not going to disturb his happy time with a sad goodbye to a man he probably will not remember tomorrow.

And with that thought in mind, I make my way out of the train station. 

After that, I didn't see him for 3 years and wasn't going to see him, or so I thought. But the universe proved me wrong. Because I bumped into him yesterday, while I was walking on the market. I froze when I saw it was him. I didn't know what to do so, as stupid as I was I turned around and walked home. 

Now I have no idea what to do with this situation. I could move on and forget that this happened or I could go and find him. 

Right as I am about to close the journal there is a knock at the door. 

And I think to myself "Who could it be? I wasn't expecting anyone, was I?"