Chapter 11: "Sugar Isn't Sweeter Than You"

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Sunday, October 28th

I am a coward. And a hypocrite.

I always told Connor that he doesn't need an excuse to talk or hang out with me, and that he just needs to ask.

Yet here I am, about to launch my excuse to get Connor to hang out with me on Halloween. He would never let it go if he found out I was doing the thing I always told him not to do. So I have to be subtle.

Me: Halloween is in 3 days.

I am genuinely and unironically one of the stupidest people I know.

A gray bubble appears, filled with three wiggling dots. He's typing, most likely to tell me how bad I am at being subtle and I'll laugh awkwardly even though he is right.

Coconut: that is true

I know he isn't dumb, so he must just be giving me mercy.

Me: I found this picture and it reminded me of you

My hands are shaking as I send him the picture. It's a picture of two cats, both wearing the tops of pumpkins on their head. They're staring just off camera, and they look very angry to be in the situation that they are in.

If I send him this he'll say something else related to Halloween and then I'll say something about how I'm not doing anything on Halloween and then he'll say if he is or isn't doing anything and if he isn't I'll say 'Oh we should hang out then', all casual-like as if it just occurred to me.

Coconut: i'm the gray one you're the spotted one

Coconut: they look so displeased

Me: That's why it reminded me of you

Coconut: thanks

Coconut: do you have any plans for halloween

This is it. He asked so I didn't have to. The plan was successful! I did it! Maybe I'm not one of the stupidest people I know.

Me: Homework:)

Nope. Still stupid.

I had the perfect opportunity to suggest that we do something for Halloween, and I didn't.

Coconut: okay good so youre not doing anything

I already chose the homework path. I'm committed.

Me: I have plans with my essay

Coconut: okay good so youre not doing anything

Maybe not that committed. I do have an essay to write, but I still have two more weeks and I'm mostly done.

Me: Fine

Coconut: cool so since you aren't doing anything you should come to this party that zoes throwing wednesday

And there it is.

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