𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐢 | 𝐬𝐩𝐧

𝐓𝐇𝐈𝐑𝐓𝐘 𝐍𝐈𝐍𝐄

hi, I'd like for you all to get a sense of carter's inner worries. we'll be sidetracking for a moment, so enjoy this with me and lmk what you think <3

please skip if triggered by suicide, death
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HER life was perfect, as far as she knew. To Carter Branch, shooting innocent rabbits and packing rock salt into bullet shells was normal. She never understood why girls in all of the fairytale stories had it easy. She was 13 and going into 7th grade with pepper spray and a pocket knife in her socks while Belle from Beauty and the Beast danced around in a palace.

However, despite the circumstances, Carter was rather happy with what she had. She had her dad. The one person who had never left her, nor did she ever have to leave. Her father protected her from the monsters and things that went bump in the night. That was until Carter came home one night 3 years afterward.

Carter was 16. She was a sophomore in high school with stable grades and already more than halfway done with her credits. She was gaining her happiness back. In fact, she had just gotten back from being with friends when she walked into her shadowy home in California.

"Dad?" Carter called, flipping on a light switch. She put her bag on the ground and walked around the house for a note---for anything. Anything for a sign on where he could have gone. She searched every corner...except for the basement.

"Come on, Dad. It isn't funny." She mumbled, opening the door. There was a faint light from an old bulb shining at the bottom of the staircase. Carter took out her gun cautiously and walked down the stairs. "Dad?"

When she got to the bottom of the staircase, her heart plummeted.

Everything had seemed so slow when she cut her father down from the ceiling and clung to his body. It was getting colder and colder, and his face paler and paler. Her world had crumbled in just a few short moments and there was nothing she could do to help it.

Carter watched the ambulance take her father's body, but it wasn't easy. She screamed and yelled and clung to him. Neighbors had ended up walking outside to see why such noises were going on at night. It only added to Carter's reasons to cry tonight.

She walked back inside of her home and grabbed a bottle of whiskey from the counter, a pistol, and her phone.

The silence was too loud. "I needed you, Dad!" She cried.

She took the cork out from the top of the round bottle. "I needed you, old man."

Carter sniffled and opened her phone and dialed her friend's number.

Hey, this is Sam. Leave a message.

"Sammy, I need help, man. I don't have anyone besides this 45 caliber... He's gone. Sam, he's gone. Please help me." She pleaded.

Carter licked the burning alcohol off of her lips and coughed. Her stomach felt empty from screaming and crying so much. She felt empty. Her father had been there for her when she tried to take her own life. He didn't leave her side, but she left his.

Carter stared at the pistol as if wanting it to do the job for her.

𝐒𝐀𝐌'𝐒 𝐀𝐏𝐀𝐑𝐌𝐄𝐍𝐓

He ruffled his hair and walked into the kitchen, his phone sitting on the counter. He watched the screen light up with a notification for one new message, then clicked on it.

"Sammy, I need help, man. I don't have anyone besides this 45 caliber... He's gone. Sam, he's gone. Please help me."

Sam grabbed his keys from a rack. "Please don't do anything stupid."

𝐂𝐀𝐑𝐓𝐄𝐑'𝐒 𝐇𝐎𝐌𝐄

"Carter?!" He shouted. Everything was a blur. His mind ran to the worst-case scenario as he opened and closed each door of the house. He finally reached Carter's father's locked door. "Carter, please tell me you're in there," Sam whispered. His heart raced as sobs erupted from the other side of the door. "He's gone, Sam. They're all fucking gone."

Sam sat down, his back against the door, and he put his head in his hands. "W-what happened, kid?" He asked her. "I found him in the basement. He---Oh god." Carter sat up and grabbed her father's rum off of the cabinet beside her. She put the whiskey where the rum was. "He used hunting rope." She told him. "Carter-" Sam began. "He left me, Sam." She interrupted.

He didn't know how to help. There was no way to make her happy again. That'd take time. "Put the gun away, okay? I need you, Carter." He pleaded softly. "I just want the pain to go away." Her voice croaked.

Sam slid his fingers under the door. She got up and he pulled them away, then she opened the door and his heart shattered. She stood with the gun in her hand and tear marks stained under her eyes. Her hair was messy and she smelled of alcohol and her father's cologne. Sam stood in disbelief until she broke down into tears again. He carefully put the gun on the counter and wrapped his arms around her head, his hand resting on the back of her neck.

They sat down on the floor, their backs against the white door. Carter collapsed her head against his chest as a whirlwind of betrayal, anger, hurt, and sadness mustered in her. He held her through the sobs, not knowing what to say. Being there was enough comfort she needed for the time being.

-

She and Sam got closer since that night. He always invited her to any event Jess forced him to go to and would look out for her when older guys came around.

𝐏𝐀𝐑𝐓𝐘

Tonight was one of the few times Sam agreed to go out. He and Jess met Carter and Lucy at their friend's house. The living room was full of stoners and drunks, the kitchen was a calmer area, and the rooms...you can imagine what happens there.

Sam found Carter in the kitchen, rocking back and forth on her heels. "Why're you alone?" He asked. "Lucy went to go 'meet' Michael. I couldn't find you or Jess so I went to the next best place." She explained. Carter handed him a red Solo cup and he began pouring himself some vodka. "Is this all they have?" He muttered. "What're you doing here alone? Where's Jess?" Carter questioned.

"Bathroom," Sam answered. A group of three people walked into the kitchen and raided the snacks. One guy, about Sam's height, approached Carter. "Mind handing me a cup, babe?" He questioned. Sam stood up straight and cleared his throat. "Just a question, Sam. She can answer it." The guy smirked. Sam faked a chuckle and grabbed him by the shoulder roughly, moving them a couple of feet away from Carter. "Good one, Lance, but you better go back to Tasha or I'll tell her every--- and I mean every --- 'rumor' I've heard about you...How's Isabel?" Sam warned in his ear.

Lance glanced. "Fine, man. No hard feelings." He scoffed, walking away. Sam stood beside Carter and wrapped his arm around her shoulder. "