Only a Human (spencer reid x oc) ✅

reoccurring dreams

Currently, the team was in St. Paul, Minnesota. We were looking for an unsub who killed women based off of what they had posted on social media. Even though he tried to hide it, I could tell Spencer was struggling with something. It became easier to notice once we were trying to talk the unsub down from killing one last girl and then killing himself.

Spencer decided to be brutally honest, trying a different approach to talking him down. I had the gun pointed at our unsub, Peter, while Morgan was helping the girl he saved from drowning in the pool. After Spencer had finished speaking, Peter faltered and the knife moved away from his neck for a moment.

"I appreciate your honesty." And with that, he slashed his own neck and fell into the pool. I lowered my gun and turned my attention to Spencer. He squeezed his eyes shut and let out a groan before rushing away. After that, it was nearly impossible to talk to him, We sat next to each other on the jet, but he kept to himself and didn't try to talk to me or anyone else.

I was packing my things up when I saw Hotch approach Spencer at his desk. He asked him about what happened with the unsub and Spencer seemed to tense up.

"Well Hotch, the last time I didn't tell somebody exactly what they needed to hear, my wife ended up in a coma. So I tried a different tactic this time."

"And this didn't work either."

"Sadly, no."

He then grabbed his things and walked out of the office. Hotch turned towards me with a confused look. I quickly apologized and followed Spencer out to the parking lot. He was quiet the entire drive home. As we were getting ready for bed, I decided to try and talk to him.

"Spence? Can we talk?"

He met my gaze before closing his eyes and sighing before walking over to the bed to sit next to me.

"I've just been on edge, I'm sorry."

I reached for his hand and wrapped mine around it. "It's okay. But you know you don't have to hold it all in. I understand that things were rough for you too and you need to talk out your feelings as well."

He slightly turned his body towards me, placing his other hand on top to our enclosed ones. "But I feel so guilty. You almost died. I want to be there for you and you shouldn't have to worry about my emotions as well as your recovery."

After his little ramble, I placed a quick kiss on his lips. It brought out a small smile in him, which I returned. "This is a two way street, okay? We talk out our problems with each other no matter what. So tell me, what's on your mind?"

We ended up staying awake and talking to each other until about two in the morning. Thankfully, we didn't have to go into work the next day. We talked about anything and everything. We laughed, cried, and gave each other many kisses. It was exactly what we needed to alleviate some stress from the last couple months. 

Even though that night brought both of our minds away from the incident, not everything just went back to normal. 

I had started having reoccurring dreams, or should I say nightmares. But I would never wake  up screaming or shaking. My eyes would shoot open and my heart would race slightly, and then I would just lay there, too scared to go back to sleep. The surprising part was that I never woke Spencer. Honestly, I didn't have the heart to wake him. Sleep has always been a struggle for him since before I even came into the picture. 

On the nights I couldn't fall back asleep, I'd try and keep myself somewhat busy. I would try to read or watch things on my phone while trying to stay as silent as possible in order to not wake up Spencer. Which is what led me to Rossi's office this morning, telling him about I case I think I stumbled upon in a small town in South Dakota. Men were dismembered and abandoned in different areas with some type of native symbolism behind it all.