Forever | Countryhumans AU | RusAme/AmeRus

10

This chapter is partly inspired by the song How to Save a Life by The Fray, you can listen to it while reading, the video is above. :)

Anyway, on to the story and triggers.

TW: SUICIDE ATTEMPT/MENTIONS AND A SMALL AMOUNT OF ANGST (WILL PUT WARNING BEFOREHAND)

"I don't have Uki's address... but he's right beside me now. I can ask him for his address right now," Canada replied to his frantic younger brother. Ukraine raised his eyebrow at the mention of his name and gestured to himself. Canada shook his head mouthed for him to wait as he listened to America's reply.

"Could you ask right now? It's urgent," America answered, trying his best to rein in his growing anxiety. 

"Okay," Canada turned to Ukraine and said, "It's Russia, America thinks he's about to do something fatal and stupid, and he wants to know your address..."

Ukraine's eyes widened. It was really happening. He felt lightheaded and his world threatened to spin. Quickly muttering his address and house's description into the phone, he took off at full sprint towards his home, Canada at his heels. 

America had hauled himself of bed and thanked his lucky stars that the doctors had taken him off the IV drip the night before. Without thinking, he changed into the clothes that Canada had dropped off this morning, supposedly when America was sleeping, for when he was discharged.

He slipped out of his room, past the nurse's desk, and to the bus stop, where he boarded the bus and alighted at the bus stop nearest to Russia's house, and ran as fast as he could to the location Ukraine had described. 

He was winded by the time he had skidded to a stop at the door and knocked frantically. An equally frantic Ukraine opened the door, with Canada close behind. Although he didn't know Russia very well, Canada's face was pale with worry.

"Where's... Russia? I got here... as fast as... I could..." America panted, his legs tensed. Ukraine led him to Russia's room. The door was locked, and America noticed how red Ukraine's eyes were red-rimmed from crying. 

"Russia! Russia, it's America, please unlock your door," America pleaded, knocking on the door. Belarus and Kazakhstan were hugging Ukraine. There was no response, and America feared for the worst.

{SUICIDE ATTEMPT/MENTIONS WARNING}
{ANGST WARNING}

"It's my fault, I shouldn't have given him the bottle of hydrocodone. I think he's gonna try to make himself overdose on them," Ukraine whispered, his voice raspy from all his crying. Canada shook his head. "Nonsense," he murmured as he wiped away Ukraine's tears with his thumb, "you didn't know he'd do this."

America pounded on the door again, louder this time. "Russia, please open the door, I'll miss you too much if you left." A painful lump formed in his throat as he realised how true that was, and how it wasn't only something to convince his friend to open up.

In the room, Russia's curtains were drawn as he sat against the door, listening to the noises outside his room. Fresh and warm tears started to roll down his cheeks and he cussed in his head. 

Fuck, why am I so weak? I've been thinking about suicide for so long, and now, when I'm going to finally do it, why am I crying just because I hear the people I care for cry and ask me to open up?

Russia swore again, but he got up to unlock the door. America, who heard the click on the other side of the door, immediately threw it open and flung himself into Russia's arm, both of their tears falling freely, surrounded by white hydrocodone pills that had spilled from the bottle when Russia fell backwards into a sitting position.

"Russia," America choked, his voice full of fear, anger and sadness, "don't you ever do that again, you hear me?" Russia nodded, choking on his own tears and emotions. America hugged him tighter. "Will you promise not to wear that pair of ridiculous sunglasses then?" Russia half-laughed, hugging America back.

"I promise," America said, and without another word, took his sunglasses off and threw it to the ground, where the lenses cracked. 

"Russia, just so you know, I've never, ever, ever blamed you for me being poisoned. It just isn't right for you to blame yourself for something you never saw coming.

"I'd rather be poisoned repetitively than to know you took your life thinking that it would protect mine and my family," America continued, burying his face in the taller male's chest and grabbing one of his hands. 

Russia exhaled, his breath ruffling America's hair. "Я тебя люблю."

America extracted himself out of the embrace they were sharing. "What?"

"Nothing." Russia replied. "Thanks for saving my life. I've realised I want to live, because life is worth living while my siblings and you are alive."

"You're welcome," America said, before his phone lit up with a text message from his parents asking where he was. "Looks like I've gotta go, my parents are asking about where I am. Let's go back, Nada."

"You really shouldn't've ran off like that, mon chéri," France admonished. "You gave us quite a fright," Britain continued, keeping his eyes on the road. Canada was in the back seat with America. They had tricked their parents into thinking that America had run to the school compound to meet up with Poland and Germany.

"Yeah," America shrugged, as they pulled into the driveway of their home, "sorry. Just wanted to see my friends. Are Aussie and Kiwi back yet?"

"No, they aren't. Do you and Canada want to pick them up?" France asked. "Sure," the two brothers responded together. 

As they walked together to the school that their younger siblings attended, America blurted out, "So... I was thinking about running away with Russia... get away from our parents and the pressure... hide away in the woods or something for a little bit... do you want to come along?"

Canada bit his lip. "That's a good offer... but what about Ukraine and our siblings?" America thought for a moment, before replying, "Ukraine can come along, and our siblings should be fine, I'm sure Mum and Dad will take good care of them."

Canada nodded. "When are we leaving home?"

"I was thinking tonight, if Russia agrees. I'm going to ask him now. I don't think his father treats him well..." America muttered, as he typed out a text message to Russia.

-Thinking of running away, Nada's coming along
-Do you want to come along with Ukraine?

-Sounds good
-Ukraine agrees

-I'll drop by your house tonight at 1am
-Pack some stuff

-Ok cya

"He agreed," America stated, looking up from his phone. "I feel bad for Aussie and Kiwi, I just got discharged from the hospital and now I'm going away again, but I think they'll be alright as long as they got each other, they're as close as heat to fire."

"I think so too."