It Gets Complicated (BoyxBoy)

Chapter 21: Love Letter

A/N:

Any bold lines will represent Jay writing in his journal and any italicized lines will represent a flashback of past events.

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I sat at work, quite conflicted. Last night, after the whole crying thing in his car, we had gone inside and watched part of a Christmas movie before Ryan had to leave. It was almost as if nothing had happened, like the past few months didn't exist and we were fine. That wasn't exactly true, though. We had been lying on the couch and both of us had hesitations that made it more than obvious that we still had some tensions to work through, but I liked to think that we could make it. We had made it through the rough patch...

I had also started telling some of my friends about him. They were skeptical of my mysterious relationship with this college guy, all of them telling me to be careful and to not drop everything for him. What they didn't know was that I had before and learned my lesson. We were supposed to go out again tonight; however, after Sunny dropped in at my work place, she had managed to change my plans.

Honestly, I was becoming so fickle in my life decisions. Ryan told me that it was alright if I would rather spend time with my friends, but I could tell he was disappointed. He'd be fine, though. I waited for him to get his shit together, so he could sit at the apartment by himself while I lived my life.

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The progressive dinner went well tonight, Sunny kept things interesting and I got a giant chocolate bar in Dirty Santa, so I'd say it was a productive evening. Ryan also left me a letter on my mailbox, so I'm about to open it up and see what this is all about.

I set my journal to the side, almost certain that I'd want to write about whatever it was that Ryan had said in this letter. I opened the envelope and pulled out a folded sheet of paper. His handwriting was displayed in black ink across the page, placing a soft smile on my face.

"Blue Jay,

I know that I'm a complete fuck up and I don't deserve you in my life. Yes, I'm sober when I'm writing this. I've been sober since that night at the party when I text Zack. I know we were only together for 3 months, but I also know that you're the one guy I want to be with for the rest of my life. Zack isn't in any part of my life anymore, I promise, and I know how much you value promises, so I promise that if you'll give me one more chance, I can be the man you always knew I could be. My parents are going on a cruise for Christmas, so I'm staying in the apartment during Winter Break. If you still have your key, you can come by at any time, you could even stay like you used to if you want. If not, here's a new copy."

I looked down into the envelope where a key was taped to the inside. There was also a dollar bill peeking at me from the corner of the envelope. My curiosity got the better of me and I pulled the money out before finishing the letter.

I unfolded the green paper and found a phone number and the words "Proffessional Stripper" written on it. An indescribable feeling of awe came over me. This was the dollar bill that Ryan had given to me on the first day that we had met. I had held onto it for a while after we started dating, but left it at the apartment at some point and all but forgot about it. He had held onto this simple dollar. He hadn't spent it on pizza, or thrown it away, he kept it. Does this mean that he's always loved me? I looked back at the letter, only having little more to read before I would be left with my thoughts.

"I'm only a phone call away, for ANYTHING that you need. I will always love you Jay.

-Ryan."

For the first time in a long time, everything felt right. Everything felt like it was finally falling into place and I thought we could make it. I was almost certain we would. I loved him...and he loved me.

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A/N:

Two smaller updates today, I hope you enjoy them <3 If you enjoyed this part of the story please leave a vote or a comment or both! Love you readers! xx

-Tay