beta's alpha (completed)

Alex- the grown incident

(Helena and other graduates above)

"My fellow students it was only four years ago we first entered these halls and now its time for us to leave the place we've come to call home. You walked into your first day in freshman year struggling to find your class and failed that math test ten times and you felt out of place. But then you go to your first football game, your first dance, first party and meet people and it's so bad."

I sat with my class looking up at Megan- something, to be honest I don't know her first name. she was always in mote advanced classes than I was no wonder she is our class valedictorian. It was quite other than her talking so I looked through the rows ahead of me even though I knew Theo was behind me. I noticed Helena a row in front of me her brown- highlighted  hair sat layered on  her shoulders. She was a good girl, she's an omega who helps out troubled kids in school on the weekends. She was a good girl, and I hated her for it.

"And now you realize that you wont very get to experience high school again but worry its not all over. The average life span is about 80 years, 3,060 of those are school days, and now that we've finished you only have 26, 140 days left ."

Because our school is a mix of humans and werewolves many of the students don't even know wolves exist, so I didn't chuckle at the inaccuracy of her statement. Due to our DNA we live for nearly 160 in human years if we don't die from rouge attacks first. The over all meaning of her speech is very inspirational most likely makes some girls cry.

"so, don't wait, spend every day like its you last because it might be , go out with friends, pull all-nighters, travel around the world, date the boy who wants everyone to know your together"

I wish it could be that way, but my life is different form everyone else's, all I have ever done is wait, and that's my role as alpha. I'm to lead and put the pack before myself, I never get to just do.

"Do it, don't wait."

I followed suite as everyone stood up ready to walk and collect my diploma, as names were called I looked over as the row before started to walk. I sat at the end of my row and I was glad I hatted being around so many people. The glance of Helena's perfect hair caught my attention, it hurt to look at her, a constant living reminder of what I am not.

I wanted to ignore all the roaming thoughts banging in my skull but the closer she got the more louder they banged.

Her hips.

Her legs.

Her hair.

Her lips.

Her eyes.

Her.

When she stood before I watched as she fell forward her face making contact with the cold grass of the field under her. I went to move and help her up when I notice what she tripped on-

My leg.

Sprawled out far enough for her to fall into. Far enough to trip her. I tripped her. The girl behind her helped her up struggling in the small space between the seats. When she was up on her feet she looked at me stunned to find my foot that tripped her. Even though I knew she wouldn't believe me I wanted to tell her it wasn't me. she glared at me before trying to wipe the dirt from her gown with no success before catching up to join the other and behind her followed the row all with glares directed at me.

When I followed the line I dreaded what would happen at the party, would she tell him. What would he do if he found out.

He'd hate me.

He wanted to let go but I can't seem to know how, I can't think without him coming into my mind or sleep without him in my dreams. I can't live without wanting him beside me. I want the nights we spend alone to last forever, the sweet nothing he whispers to be or the soft gentle way he touches me making me his.

"Alex Hasting" I looked at the stage and walked up shaking all the hands and taking my diploma with me when I rejoined my seat I looked down at the simple paper in my hands the only thing I earned on my own. No birthright or statues. . . all me.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

The party was awkward, my mother stayed by my side most of it and I was thankful, I didn't want to handle the other teenagers that kept eyeing my down. As my father stated to make his speech my mother left my side and I noticed a presence near me.

A presence I know better than myself, I looked over as he started to head inside slipping through the crowd not looking back, I stared till he reached the porch. He held a hand up signaling me to follow.

I wish I could read his thoughts wanting to know what was going on in his beautiful head as he went into my room. I followed behind him staring at the dark floor boards before looking up at him as I turned around.

"Are we going to talk about it?"  I shivered at his voice, since last week I haven't see much of him so hearing him made old feelings come alive like fire. it started in the pit of my stomach crawling up to my chest settling deep in my heart. 

"About what?' I asked shaking my head with the pervious thought of him i just had hoping he wasn't going bring up what happened with Helena.

"What happened during the ceremony?" he closed the door softly not trying to draw attention to us since we left the party so suddenly.

fuck

"It was accident" I said, and it wasn't a lie, I didn't know how it happened it was like my body had a mind of its own.

"You tripped her in front of the whole school, her family, the pack that doesn't sound like an accident" he said loud and waved his arms making him look bigger than he really was.

It wasn't me, my body did it, I had no control" not able to contain my anger, he had no idea what I was going though right now. He was enjoying the high life with a new girlfriend and a school that loves him. He doesn't understand.

"What?" he asked a confused expression on his face.

"I don't know okay im sorry I screwed up her gown and I'm sorry I screwed up your perfect life" my voice lowered as I

"Alex i-" his eyes fell sorrow filling his atmosphere but the last thing I wanted was his pity.

"Why are you acting like you care ?!" I yelled making I'm sure passing people look towards the door scared of the deep voice.

"Because I do care about you" he went to grab my arm hoping to force me to calm down, but I yanked it away and moved back towards the bed. I had every right to be mad.

"Since when ?" I yelled against glaring at him, I was always Theos friend, no one knew me except for the alphas son. I never had name, to them I wasn't a person.

"Since birth, remember that! You're my best friend " I couldn't yell anymore I couldn't let myself, I had to have self-control. I had to push him away, it was for the best. We don't get what we want, it just the way it is.

But I couldn't help myself I just had to know-

"Do you love me?"