Chapter 36: Dean

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Chapter 36: Dean

I love you.

I love her.

I love Veronica.

I thought that what I felt for Veronica was just an infatuation, something which will go away as time moves on. It certainly seemed that way to me first, I mean who would not be attracted to a gorgeous woman who is so confident and dynamic. There was never a dull moment with her.

But the moment I had said those words, I knew them to be true. I didn't feel that way for her because of the heat of the moment, just to placate her as she had cried and cried in front of me. I felt those feelings down to my bones.

Sure, there have not been any defining romantic moments between us, but that's what makes it special. My feelings for her were not manipulated or forced by some insane reason. They came naturally. And that is how I know they will stay.

"Do you regret it?" She had asked, as she had stared up at the ceiling.

"Regret what?" I asked, turning on my side from my place on the sofa, tired from our excursion. The night had been long.

She had shifted as well, turning on her side to face me, our eyes clashing in the short distance

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She had shifted as well, turning on her side to face me, our eyes clashing in the short distance. I did not think I could ever get used to the grey in her eyes. When I first saw her, I thought her eyes were blue. But being around her for so long, I could tell what she was feeling. She had the eyes of dove feathers, not the albino kind, but the ones with a hue so softly grey that they could have been pencil drawn. Usually, they had that look of birds flying on sunlit days, the shine and quick movement, yet relaxed, purposeful, at ease.

But last night, the single switched on lamp had highlighted how her eyes were irritated and tired from all the crying, the iris that always reminded me of a soft, comfortable, fluffy blanket looked torn, broken.

"Saying that you loved me." She timidly asked, her voice barely reaching me. I had begun shaking my head in a 'no' even before she could finish her sentence.

"Do you really mean it?" She had yawned, covering her mouth adorably with the blanket.

A brief pause.

I had wordlessly winced as I had gotten up from my makeshift bed, my muscles sore as hell. My feet padded across the carpeted floor and I grunted as I kneeled down in front of her. She was lying on the edge, so it was easy for me to brush a few wayward strands of her face. Her eyes were locked on my face. I could see emotions twirling in them like a tornado. The digital night clock in the corner showed it was almost two in the morning.

I hated the fact that she doubted my words. But I couldn't blame her either. It was maybe too early for us. We knew each other only for a couple of months, where we had worked together in a professional capacity. We had become good friends since.

I wasn't even sure if she felt the same way or I was about to be friend-zoned big time. Nervousness was a cold zap in my spine, subdued by the minutest spark of hope. I should at least try once, right? I can't live my life regretting never telling her the depth of the feelings I was just realizing.

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