"The orphanage"

The Silence

My heart is still hurting, and im still in my room..huh it been a week now and all i can see is my brother secretly dating my crush- well EX crush, through to be honest..i still havn't quite gotten my feelings of Jeff..i just can't! I wish i had someone to talk this through with..but Ashley turns out just to be using me for own amusement and my brother...a tear fell down..is a liar! can't trust a liar this entire family is nothing but bullshit, why the fuck didn't they just abort me? but even the lady didn't seem to care much about my disappearing, i guess i am truly just a waste of space...

After two weeks still not coming out, the smell of dirtyness had  corrupted the room, i still havn't ate anything...great way to lose Fat huh? Havn't gotten dressed, have only been out of bed to go to the toilet....it didn't matter anyway, i guess its true when they say "If you don't have any family..then you are nothing" never thought i agree with that statement, two girls was talking outside my door "Pft can you imagine? Her brother was gay this entire time!" a girl voice said, i couldn't regonize it due to lack of food and dizziness "Yeah and they even both liked the same guy!" the other girl replied, why are they even on my floor? oh they must have the floor cleaning duty, the thought of what had happened two weeks ago did still hurt "Honestly i don't feel bad for him" "Right? He really deserve to be in pain" Huh? Oliver is in pain? why on earth would HE be in pain?!! he got evereything i ever wanted! He havn't even TRIED to reconnect with me...yeah him being in pain? i doubt it! "Can you believe it? The lady asked ME to do HIS stairs duty! Just because he is so obvious tired" the first girl voice said,  seems like even the lady feel him..so unfair, somehow that made me tear up..i should just stay in and Die! "It is so unfair! it ain't your fault he decided to do all Temza's duties as well" girl 2 says, Wait Oliver do my duties? but why??? "What are you doing here! dont your got rooms to clean?" a deep voice sudden echo...it is my brother's voice "Tch we're just taking a break before i have to do YOUR cleaning!" the first girl sounds annoyed, i could hear my brothere sighs "Just ignore it..i'll do them later" he says tired "As if the lady allows that" the girl says and footsteps appears...i guess they left? My brother's door got opened...i guess he went to his room, but why on earth would he do my duties? To get my forgiveness? well it aint gonna happen!!! someone is gently knocking my door "Temza? I know i am not the person you wanna hear but.." It was Jeff, the sound of his voice makes me remember all the time i liked him...and the moment i found out the truth! "Can't you come out please? Oliver is both mentally and physically exhausted i-i don't know how much longer he can take it, i hate seeing him like this and he refuse to let me help him" Jeff continues "He do this as his punishment for everything that happened in between you two! He sees it as his entirely fault" Jeff sounds hurts...he really loves Oliver doesn't he? "He does everything for you Temza, he lies for the lady so she doesnt wonder why you ain't being seen, he do all your duties before anyone can ask and he calls your school every morning to tell them you are sick..he hardly sleeps at night because of this! He do all this..just so you can be left alone, he is so tired..i am so scared he'll end up making himself sick! so please...can't you come out and just..let yourself be seen? you don't have to speak or do anything..but pleasse just show yourself so he doesn't have to lie so much...he is hurting so badly" Jeff finishs with a sobbering, he loves my brother so much huh...but i don't think im ready to face any of them yet....the thoughts, the memories..the feelings..it all still hurts so much! But.....Oliver has been in pain for 2 weeks..