XIII

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Months passed, the Straw Hat Crew has entered the Grand Line. Meeting new people and making new friends along the way. I gotta admit, the crew is slowly changing my opinions about life, my life. But secrets cannot be hidden forever, the crew had discovered my horns at a certain point in our journey.

"I'm just a monster ain't I?"

I remember myself asking, but the only response from my captain was

"WOAH! AWESOME!!"

I remember the ways my eyes widened and how my tears flew out. I remember how everyone comforted me, they thought it was cool. I've never heard anyone saying that, my existence, was okay.

But no happiness lasts forever either. I was sick, even Chopper didn't know what it was, I had begged him to not tell anyone. To not make anyone worry. But the nightmares haunted me. The day my mother died, the night I stabbed my father, the years I was feared by people like I was some kind of deadly virus, the night that they killed me...

Then the Blue Island appeared. There, I met my 'mother.' But she doesn't seem to remember me. I tried to talk to her, to hug her, to remind her of us. But she didn't talk to me, she didn't have any facial expressions, she only threw me away from her again and again. Until I was covered in blood, then she vanished. That night, my half-brother came to us, on the ship. He said that wasn't my mother, it was only an illusion, but it felt so real.

He talked to me, he knew I was dying. He gave me a flower petal before our departure, it molded into my palm. He said that it'll help me. Well, hopefully. After we left, I felt better, but it was only for a few weeks.

We arrived in Water 7, meeting Franky, we fought against the world government together for Robin. Then saying goodbye to Merry. Franky became the shipwright on our new ship, Thousand Sunny. I had asked for a separate room that is higher up, better with a transparent ceiling, so I could see the stars. Sanji and I got closer and closer, which I didn't want, what if I died? Would he be sad?

"Forget about the past, just live in the present."

I remember him, trying to comfort me

"I'm trying..."

x x x

Thriller Bark was a scary place, but I laughed a lot. Especially at the zombies, since I thought they looked funny. We met Brook, the dead and skeletonized musician. We fought against one of the seven warlords, so he could give everyone's shadow back. Well, it was a fun time really.

But I have no more time left. I wish the flower petal would really help me, like what my brother had said.

Sorry, I couldn't be with you guys for long. But I will come back, I promise.

That was all I wrote that night, the night my body became transparent, the night I vanished. I can only hope that they won't freak out that much. I chuckled to myself.

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