Since You've Been Gone

chapter 44- drowning

when i look at you- miley cyrus

Christmas is a big time for a lot of people. Whether it's solely for religious purposes or you're running around looking for the best holiday sales, this time of the year brings a tremendous amount of joy.

Here in Vandalia, temperatures were finally beginning to drop, and it actually felt like winter. The cold wind was something that I embraced and welcomed every year, happy that the Texas heat was calming down for a little while. Each night the sun set earlier and earlier, the darkness of winter casting over the whole town, and although I loved the sunshine, watching the Christmas lights twinkle in the night was one of my favorite things.

There was just something so different about sitting on the porch watching your cold breath spill out while you were wrapped up in a soft blanket with a steaming cup of hot chocolate in your hands. It was soothing, and it reminded me of my childhood.

Christmas was definitely the biggest holiday for the Stryker family. My mom went all out with decorations – which usually meant our house was adorned in green and red by the weekend after Thanksgiving – and my dad always took the majority of the month off from work.

As a child, this time of year didn't just mean presents and time off from school, but it was when I got to spend time with my dad that I didn't normally get to.

Growing up, I always idolized my dad because he was the mayor and I just thought that was the coolest thing ever. In my head, that meant he was in charge of everyone and everything, kind of like the president. But one thing that made me realize, that you know, maybe my dad didn't, have the coolest job was the fact that he missed out on so much while I was growing up.

Whether he was in his office downtown sitting at his large cherry oak desk or away at the state capital, Doug Stryker was always busy doing something. He had missed birthday parties and sporting events and nearly missed Toby's high school graduation, and I know that must have given him so much stress, but it really bummed me out as a kid.

But when winter break rolled around, my dad took off the entire time. He was home from the middle of December through the first week of January and those days gave me some of my best memories. Picking out a Christmas tree, wrapping presents on my parent's bedroom floor, baking sugar cookies for Santa; were the memories that I would cherish for the rest of my life and tell stories to my kids about.

"Hope!" My mom calls up the stairs, where I imagine her standing with her hands on her hips. "Everyone will be here in 20 minutes! Are you ready?"

"Yes!" I called back. It took me nearly two hours and about a thousand FaceTime calls with Layla in order to figure out what I should wear tonight. In all honesty, I wanted to stroll downstairs in my pajama pants and one of the t-shirts that I had snatched from Connor but, I knew how serious my mom took formal wear and I was not about to test her limits.

So, between Layla and I, we had settled on a red floor-length dress that wrapped underneath my bust, creating a draping effect that insinuated my round stomach. I paired it with a pair of silver heels that I was lucky my swollen ankles could still fit in and silver jewelry that complimented the dress.

While holding the handrail, I slowly ascended the stairs, careful not to trip on the hem of my dress. That would be so embarrassing and would without, a doubt hurt, but as I replayed the image of me tumbling down the stairs, I couldn't, help but let out a chuckle.

It was pretty funny.

"Oh, Hope!" My mom's hands were clasped over her cheeks as she stood at the bottom of the steps, watching me come down. "You look wonderful!"