For The First Time

Reflection

Hey guys! In the previous chapter, I used the term Mimosa to indicate Arthit's mood. Mimosa pudica is the botanical name of the 'Touch-me-not' plant. I didn't want to use the cliched, overused term, so I called it Arthit's Mimosa mood. I am sorry! I should have explained it in the note!

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"P'Arthit. I know that our first attempt has left us confused and muddled. I have a request. Can we talk about it? Discuss it? Openly? Please!"

Arthit's breath hitched hearing this request. While he understood that Kongpob's request was valid, but his bashful side kicked in. Pursing his lips, he looked at Kongpob, shy. Saying no was not an option, but he knew once Kongpob starts his persuading, he will have to open up his heart and share intimate details he was too awkward sharing.

Seeing Arthit's confusion, Kongpob softly coaxed, "P', if we don't talk about this, it will only lead to a lot of confusion here on! We both had made plans about this, but unfortunately, our lack of communication led us to this point, don't you think?"

Arthit thought about what Kongpob said and nodded in agreement.

"I wanted to plan this for us, and I have been reading all about it. I had planned to go away somewhere next month. But you pleasantly surprised me today. Ummm... Thank you so much for doing this for us!" Arthit's eyes widened, hearing Kongpob's plans.

"P', when you decided to plan this, why didn't you tell me? Was it because you were shy?"

Arthit nodded. Shifting slightly, he turned to look at Kongpob.

"I wanted to surprise you, Kong. I didn't want the first time to happen at the dorm, so I felt going away would be a good idea. All this lie about meeting P'Sathit... I didn't have the courage to tell you beforehand, so I called you to the hotel. I felt extremely shy and flustered about the whole idea. What could I say, Kong? That I have planned 'it' in a hotel. Lord knows the stupid grin on your face would have made me regret my decision from the word go."

"Hey! What's that?"

"Will you deny it? Will you deny that had you known, the entire time, you would be grinning like an idiot while I would be dying of embarrassment?"

Kongpob chuckled. What Arthit pointed out was bang on! Had Arthit told him of his plans, he would be grinning and smiling the entire time like a Cheshire cat, making it awkward for Arthit.

"Alright! You are right! But why did you ask me to meet here? We could have come together on the pretext of meeting your cousin."

"I needed some time. I wanted to ensure everything was set, and I needed some time to prepare myself... mentally and physically,"

Kongpob nodded thoughtfully.

"Also...also I was keeping my options open," Arthit admitted, guilty.

"Options?"

"In case... in case I couldn't. Ufff! In case I couldn't go through with it, or I chickened out last minute, I wouldn't have called you here," Arthit rushed through. Kongpob felt weird hearing this.

"Have I been rushing you, P'? Do you feel rushed?"

"Noooo! Kong, no! I know it's an awful way of thinking, but I got scared. Trust me, it's me. It's not you. It really is about me."

Kongpob nodded but didn't respond. Worried, Arthit sat up, looking his lover in the eye.

"Kong! Promise me you will not overthink this. I am sorry that I thought of this, but please, can you not overthink this? I swear I meant it when I said I am ready on my birthday. Even I want you, Kong. Just like you do."