Alice in Hell (Alpha/Omega)

Alice is Home

ALICE POV

To be honest, the shock from the news that I've lost my Omega had worn off quite quickly for me. The numbness I've been feeling since I woke up just confirmed to be what I almost kinda knew already, now it was just solidified by the doctors words. You have lost you Omega permanently. As heartbreaking as that was, I was not the person in the room that took that news the worst.

Every single one of my mates had this heartbreaking look on their faces, this was one of the worst outcomes for them to have happened, that was clear. Seungkwan had not stopped hugging me close since the doctor had stopped talking, subconsciously trying to scent me. The ones farthest away from the bed had moved closer without realising and was either looking at the doctor or at me. There was pity in their eyes, pity because now I was technically mateless.

But it made sense what the doctor was saying, ever since I've awoken, I haven't been able to feel the bond, it just seemed gone. The spark that usually was there whenever I touched one of them was gone, I should be able to feel them right now the way Kwan is hugging me but no. I vaguely remember feeling the connection when Jungkook had picked me up before that man injected me with whatever he did, but it was so brief and short lived and I kinda wished that I appreciated that more than I did in that moment, saving that feeling closely to the heart. But now it was all gone and that felt scary and lonely.

For the first time in a long time I was completely alone in a room full of people, even before I met them I had a connection to them but now that was gone, I was no longer connected to my soulmates.

Don't get me wrong, I still care for them deeply and this predicament is not gonna change that fact but it's now definitely different. I still found comfort laying with Seungkwan, I still found comfort in Namjoon's hand in mine as he spoke to Seungcheol, these things still brought me happiness but I was not sure if this was romantic love anymore. This felt more platonic than anything. Or maybe it's because I was not used to feeling love without that connection that I truly couldn't recognise it even when staring directly at it.

This was an awful thing to feel because I missed them so much and I wanted to shower them in as much love as they deserved but I wouldn't be able to do that without being to a certain point dishonest with myself and that would not be fair for any of us. So I'll just enjoy their company until they realise that I truly are not an Omega anymore, they get bored of me and get rid of me.

Don't know if it was luck or misfortune that just a few hours after the doctor had visited my room that I was getting discharged. On one hand, I could finally get home but that also meant facing a lot of problems that I don't know if I was ready to face yet.

Joshua went down to the pharmacy to get my prescriptions while the rest of us went down to the car to get home.

The car ride home had this weird vibe to it, Wonwoo and Seokmin had taken each seat beside me, their hands holding mine while talking to me but it was being drowned out by the noise of the cars outside and I found myself stare out of the window to look at the cars drive by, trying to remember the route we were taking home. I think that as soon as they saw that I was not in the mood for talking they switched to the mind link, clearly talking to each other while still stroking my hands.

I hated this so much, how was it fair that I should lose such a big thing of me that I loved so much. I missed the feeling of knowing that someone was on your side and loved you all the way through even though you had flaws. I wanted that feeling back, so I leaned myself up against Wonwoo in the hopes of anything happening that resembled the time before but no. The only thing I could feel was the hitch of Wonwoo's breath as he felt me leaning against him. But he soon enough relaxed and raised his hand. This action unfortunately made my flinch away from him and the expression his face broke me. His heart broke at the sight of me being afraid of him. I flinched at him....