Nightmare {h.s | au}

1.16

Dad had refused to go back to work the rest of the day and wouldn't let me out of his sight. So we sat in the living room together, watching movies and eating assortments of junk food. Neither of us complained much and we actually talked about how work was going and things alike. I enjoyed how relaxing the afternoon had been and even how willing Dad was to order food instead of cooking. Having to cook a meal right now would require getting up and I was quite comfortable in my assortment of blankets on the couch.

"Sam's going to walk to the high school and Reece will give him a ride home from there," Dad said, coming back into the room.

I looked out of the slight crack in the curtain to see that the weather had gotten worse today. The sky looked ready to tear Redmond a new one at any second. So I looked back at Dad, frowning at him with my eyes narrowed. He didn't seem to catch on for he never looked away from the television. I was really surprised when he had agreed to watch The Perks of Being a Wallflower, but he had seemed adamant on watching it and enjoyed it now.

"Sam can't walk in this weather," I said quite loudly.

Dad turned his head to me without taking his eyes off of the screen. It was kind of frightening to see him like that but I made no mention. "Charlie is lying in the snow right now."

"Pennsylvania snow isn't as bad as Washington thunderstorms, Dad," I prodded him.

He paused the movie and gave me his full attention. I pulled the blankets tighter around me and waited for him to begin talking. But he didn't. He just sighed and kicked the leg of his lazy boy down to get to his feet.

"C'mon, Eddie. You're coming too," he grumbled, going to the garage door and shoving his feet in his shoes.

"Since when did I have a sex change?" I asked quite loudly, burrowing deeper in my blankets. I was not going to leave my cocoon if I did not have to. Right now, I did not have to just because Sam needed a ride. Dad was here for that.

"Let's go, Eden!" he yelled from the garage.

All it did was make me lie down on my side and absorb the warmth that I was getting from the multiple layers of blankets. There was no reason for me to get up and go with him. Dad could handle little Sammy. It was just a ride after all so what was it that made him think that I needed to go?

Dad clopped back into the living room and stood at what was now the foot of the couch. His arms were crossed over his chest as he stared down at my bundled form. With a sigh, I got up-I kept one of the warmest blankets wrapped around me-and shuffled to the door. I slid my feet into Reece's slides before thumping over to the already running car. Neither of us said anything as Dad backed out of the garage, but once we were headed down our street, Dad said, "Eden...you know I worry about you, about all of you."

"I know," I said, dragging my hand from the warmth and putting it on top of his. He took a second to grab my hand in his and squeeze.

I knew it took a lot for him to say things like this. Dad wasn't very good at expressing how he felt and preferred not to. All he wanted to do was work, come home, and keep the family in one piece-what was left of it. One time when I was younger, before the divorce, Dad told me that the only time people needed to talk about their feelings was in a dire state of emergency. It was during the time that I was so angry at Mom and couldn't help but voice it all of the time.

"If you're having your...attacks again, you have to tell me. I can't help you if you don't say anything," Dad said, staring out of the windshield.

He didn't want to look at me when talking about this. It was too hard for him to go through it again. If there was a list of things that he didn't want for his children, the one at the top of the list would be to go through what his sister went through. And right here, right now, I was going through it all but there was a difference.