When Fire Meets Fire

Chapter Twenty Six

August
"What do you want?" I ask, probably more aggressive than I meant to.

"I just... wanted to see if you're ok?" Ashton says softly.

He wasn't joking or being a dick or ignoring me for some reason. He was being genuine, I wasn't sure if he cared or just wanted to taunt me for being weak.

"I'm fine." I say as I look down. I wasn't fine but I didn't want him to know that.

He walked over to my desk and leaned himself against it.

"I know you're not fine. You don't have to pretend. I'm sorry for what happened, we will find who did this."

"You know just as well as I do that it was fucking Marcus. That fucking man killed my best friend and my parents and I know it." I state coldly.

I wasn't intending to come across so harsh, but I was in pain.

"I know... Oscar stayed with her until the ambulance came but they didn't make it in time."

The thought of Oscar holding her lifeless body broke me. I couldn't even be strong enough to be there for her when she needed me.

I didn't even get to say goodbye.

"What's done is done. We can't let our guard down again. Someone knew we were there last night, not only were my guys there but so were some of yours." It made me wonder whether we had a snake in our inner circle.

How would Marcus know we were there? Why would he target us when he had no reason to, unless someone told him about our plan but only my closer circle knew of it.

"I don't know August but something isn't adding up." Ashton stated rather matter of factly.

Then an unbearable thought crossed my mind.

"Was it you?"

"Was it me what?" Ashton asked confused.

"Have you been playing me this whole time? Did you fucking tell Marcus about the plan, are you secretly working with him?" I sounded more aggressive than ever now and this time, I meant it. I was afraid and I was scared that he knew I was afraid.

The thought of Ashton betraying me scared me more than anything because as much as I hate to admit it, I do care about him and I pray he isn't double crossing me.

"What the- no... why would you even fucking think that?" He stood up off the desk now and looked at my through his harsh eyes.

"Well wouldn't be the first time someone pulled something like this, I'm sorry." I say, I believe him but a part of me wanted to blame someone for what happened but deep down it felt like my fault more than anyone else's.

"I would never put you in fucking danger are you out of your mind? I care about you as much as I fucking hate to say it but I do August. You're more than just a whore I want to fuck and you're more than just a business partner." He slammed his hand on the desk and it made me jump slightly. I was on edge and even the slightest movement of his made me feel uneasy.

I didn't know what to expect.

The words he spoke ran through my head, he said he cares about me and I so desperately wanted to tell him how I felt back.

"If my loyalty hasn't been proven then I don't know what else to fucking say. I was there for you last night, protecting you. I defended you and after all that I took you home and put you to bed and I stayed there for hours making sure that you were ok because I didn't want anything fucking bad happening to you." He was shouting now, Ashton was trying to get his point across and I acted like I wasn't fazed but really, I was listening to everything he was saying.

"Maybe you should let something bad happen to me, it would be better for everyone that way." I say, i was half joking but a part of me meant it. I wasn't sure why I felt so weak and vulnerable but it was getting to me and I was struggling to focus.

"Don't ever fucking say that. Everyone needs you, I fucking need you." He almost whispered the last part.

I didn't respond and instead just took another gulp of whiskey.
Ashton put his fingers between his brows and scrunched up his face.

"When you're ready to talk to me and not act like a fucking alcoholic then you know where to find me." He said before getting up and leaving the room, he slammed the door on the way out.

Every time I have the chance to say how I feel or reach out and confide in someone, I blow it.

Ashton
I slammed the door and stood outside for a second.

Maybe I shouldn't have been so hard and calling her an alcoholic was a bit far, I can't talk as I drink all the time.

I could tell she was hurting and I wanted to be there for her and help her. The idea of being there for her made me feel weak, I was letting a woman corrupt my thoughts but I had the feeling if roles were reversed, August would be acting the same as me.

The thoughts of last night ran through my mind, the kiss, the things I said... I wanted her to say something, anything would have been nice but then it all went downhill.

Marcus was a dead man and I know it was him who did this, there was no other person with motive and I think someone is double crossing both me and August.

I longed to hold her and tell her everything was going to be ok. I wanted August to feel safe with me and I know she's a strong women and doesn't need me to protect her but I still want her to want me.

I care for her and want her to understand that, I think maybe deep down she does but maybe now wasn't the time to confess how I felt.

The idea of turning around and going back in the room to comfort her crossed my mind but the idea soon faded away as I realised she's probably better off alone right now.

I had never felt this way about anyone and to tell August how I felt was terrifying, it was worse than fucking death. I was never this week and I never caught feelings for anyone, I only ever had one night stands and even that was pointless.

Last night made me realise how much I do want August. I fucking put my life on the line for her to protect her. I wouldn't do that for anyone not even my most trusted men.

I walked away and headed for the garden. I sat on one of the chairs outside and rolled a joint. I needed to take August off my mind as she seemed to be all I ever think about.

Maybe that wasn't such a bad thing.