Swallowed in the Sea

Fear of the Water

"I don't understand any of this," I groaned and furiously took a bite from my sandwich before throwing it aside once again, my hands gripping onto fistfuls of my hair.

I had done the horrible deed of procrastinating my math assignment, putting it off again and again. The consequences of my actions were really coming back to haunt me though as I struggled to finish what I had left before my math class.

Which was right after lunch.

"What is it?" Ila glanced over her lunch to look at the papers I had sprawled out on the cafeteria table.

I made a face, "Algebra maybe?"

"Maybe?" Ila raised an eyebrow.

"I don't know okay," I rubbed my eyes tiredly, "All math sounds the same."

Ila didn't say anything as she pursed her lips. Pushing her lunch aside, she swivelled the papers around so that she could read them.

"Well...you're not entirely wrong," Ila bit back a smile and I scowled at that.

"Let me guess, just mostly wrong," I rolled my eyes and snatched the papers back.

Ila chuckled, "Look, I can help you with it after school if you want to come over?"

Her words caught me so off guard that I dropped the pencil I was holding, watching it roll off the table before landing on the floor with a clatter.

"I mean, unless you're busy of course," Ila quickly said before the silence could grow, "Or I mean if you don't want to it's fine."

"No, I just...I would have to ask whoever's picking me up and then if it's not Callie and Arizona I'd have to ask them," I promptly explained, "And I mean...whatever this is, it's due like in an hour."

Ila nodded slowly, "I see...well I meant that I could also maybe help you with the concept too."

"Oh," I bit my lip, "Yeah...that would be really great. I can ask after school."

Ila nodded again and broke out into a smile, "Sounds good."

~~~

I ended up stressing about asking Callie and Arizona if I could go over to Ila's the rest of the school day. It was an issue, how worried I was about it.

I should have been relieved when the dismissal bell rang but instead, my stomach was so worked up that I felt like puking.

It wasn't until I spotted Arizona waving at me from the parking lot that I realized that I hadn't been stressing about asking.

I was stressed about the answer.

"Hey!" Arizona grinned when I got close enough to the car to hear her when she talked, "How was school?"

I stopped and began fiddling with the straps of my backpack, "Good."

"Is something wrong?" Arizona furrowed her eyebrows when she saw that I made no move to get in the car.

"Can I ask you if I can go over to Ila's and can you say no?" I blurted out in one breath.

It took Arizona a moment to decipher what I had just said. I began to shift my weight from foot to foot, knawing at my bottom lip while I did so.

"Okay...sure," Arizona looked confused but agreed.

"Can I go over to Ila's?" I asked and opened the car door.