C A P I T O L O Q U A R A N T A T R E

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LA SOLITUDINE:

Loneliness.

T H E O ' S   P O V:

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T H E O ' S   P O V:

Why was history repeating itself? Is it to make me suffer more than I should? The same old distance between two lovers is being repeated. Melanie and I have suffered our part, but seeing our daughter and Valerius's pain just brings us the same discomforting suffering.

Months have gone by and spring was spreading its blossoming flowers everywhere, yet Shira seems to be a young bud not being able to blossom without the person she needs right now. Valerius was that person she needed but she's denying it.

The loneliness of each has impacted both. Shira has trapped herself in the four walls of her room, barely coming out to see anyone. Each time I go in there, she is either curled up in bed or she is looking out the window. Every night, I pull myself together and put her to sleep as I used to do when she was a child.

My daughter was in a realm of pain, the same realm that I had to go through. If only Shira would put her walls down then perhaps her suffering would end. Valerius has visited almost every day or every night yet he returns home with an empty soul.

I know that every morning or every night, Shira looks out of the window to see her other half walk away like a numb spirit, carrying the heavy guilt he has on his shoulders. They are both blaming themselves for a crime they haven't done, each suffering from the miles they put apart.

-

"Chérie, can I come in?" I knocked on the door of Shira's room, the sniffling inside seemed to stop and Shira's croaked voice doesn't hide how she was crying once again. The room was eerily cold, in fact too cold. "Chérie, you will catch a cold." Shira didn't seem to care but went over to the window and closed it with a sigh.

I knew that feeling too well, the feeling of being numb. No cold air could be colder than how you feel on the inside. The cold might prick your skin but the pain on the inside stabs you and that haunts you, that is what keeps you up at night.

Shira lays down on her bed and wipes her eyes that have puffed up and the red under them have become menacing. My baby has been through so much and still, the pain hasn't gone, what have I done that my child is being punished for?

"Come here, chérie ." As I sit on the edge of the bed, I pull her close to my body, Shira's head lays flat against my chest and I begin to stroke her hair like I did when she couldn't sleep during a thunderstorm. "Chérie, Valerius came over today again." Shira turned to look up at me and her eyes slowly turned into glass.

"Papa, I don't want to see him," Shira sniffed, wiping her face, "But I need him." Lowering my head, I kissed her head. Shira wasn't stupid at realising something was missing in her life but she is the type of person who needs a little help along the way else she will return back to square one.

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