Chapter 13

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Rain pounds the window in my living room as I gather my stuff for classes. It was a cold day, 2 days after the match, and my embarrassing loss of control in front of the one person who I shouldn't let my facade down for.

I pull on a thin sweater on top of my v-neck and jeans, and a coat as well since it was cold and windy as well as rainy outside. As I put my laptop into my bag, I look out the window, zoning out. The day was gloomy but nice in a way that it created a cozy atmosphere. All I wanted was to curl up on my couch with a cup of hot chocolate and a movie or book.

With one last sigh and a wistful look at my bed, I pick up my thermos of coffee and walk out my door, closing it behind me. I open my umbrella as I reach the bottom of the stairs, smiling at the doorman before walking out to cover the short distance to Duke.

By the time I got there, the wind had made my hair messy and the bottom of my jeans wet due to rain. There were 15 minutes left before my first class, so I quickly walked into the restroom to clean up.

I close the door to a stall just as I hear a few pairs of footsteps enter, girls giggling and talking amongst themselves.

"Oh my god, did you see him last match though? He looked so good in that uniform, I swear Reece is the hottest man on campus."  A giggling voice reached my ears. At the mention of his name, I freeze, my mind automatically, albeit subconsciously, agreeing to her statement.

"Didn't you two sleep together a couple of times?" Another voice asks. The sentence makes me want to throw up suddenly, but the urge is quelled by the next few words the first girl uttered.

"As much as I want to sleep with him, no. He always pushes me away, and I think he does that to other girls too. The only girl I've seen him pay attention to is Iris," I could hear jealousy and disgust in her voice.

"Oh, come on, he's horrible to her, I don't know why you'd be envious of her. God, the things that poor girl has gone through." A third voice said. I recognized her as Tracy, a girl I shared my microeconomics class with.

"Whatever, I'm pretty sure she's a skank out to get him. Did you see Trent and Jamie, by the way? They look like they've been beaten up by a gang or some shit." The girl mutters. I can hear the popping of a lipstick lid as a sickening feeling in my stomach grows. This is such an uncomfortable situation.

"I heard," The second girl says, plopping something down on the counter. "that Reece beat them up. Something about them mistreating a girl? Mandy said that he warned them to not go near 'her' and not touch her ever again."

"Sounds ominous," Tracy murmurs.

"Who cares, I just wish Iris had gone to another campus, I would have had better chances to fuck and then dump that man." The girl said with disgust in her voice. "The slutty nerd who has him wrapped around his finger."

At the last sentence, I decide I can't take it anymore. I have heard Reece say worse about me and to me, but the words, coming from people I barely knew, stung. I close my eyes for a few seconds and open the stall door with my bag in my hands, storming out of the now-quiet bathroom without meeting anyone's eyes.

When I reach my class, I take a few deep breaths and fall into the numb state I had learned to adapt when my mother had just started to drink and take out her anger on me. I welcomed the nothingness, thinking that it made me feel better than the hurt and anger I felt so much of these days.

After an hour the professor calls for a break, asking us to come back to class within an hour as we had a double session with him. I close my book, sighing, and pick my bag up, rushing out. Roxy had texted me and told me that she couldn't meet for lunch because of an extended class, so I bought a sandwich and headed to the courtyard. I spot a few friends who Roxy and I often went out with, and sat with them.

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