"Intoxicated"

11

"She gone"y/n said with her voice breaking up.Tommy didn't move a muscle.He wasn't saying anything ,wasn't speaking anything but was just sitting still.
"It was meant for me"he finally said turning to look at y/n.His eyes were red from crying.The were looking like they were bleeding.
"Tommy it's not your fault"y/n said with her voice not even audible
"It's was fucking mean it for me!!!!"he screamed.Y/n didn't shy back because she wasn't afraid.
"She took a bullet for me"he said with his voice breaking up.She knew it was meant for him but she took it and that's not his fault.
"I should be fucking dead not she!!!!"he shouted.He was an inch away from a breakdown.
"Tommy she's gone now and there's nothing we can do to change it"y/n said
"It's wasn't supposed to be this way I should have been dead!!!!"He screamed again.Tears breaking from his eyes
"But you're not okay!!!You have to get revenge for her!!!"y/n said crying and hugging him with his head resting on her chest
"For her Tommy"she said crying
"For her"he managed to say

A week passed by and Tommy was still damaged from inside.The Shelby house was silent and dead.Tommy never showed another emotion in front of y/n or anyone else.He drank a lot in that week because of the amount of pain he was going through.Y/n didn't meet him that whole week because she wanted to give him some space and time.She watched him from far away and took care of him from far away.Y/n finally decided to meet him after a week.
It was around 9:00 at night and y/n reached his house.She slightly knocked on the door a few times.But no one answered.She turned the door knob and it was opened.She entered the house and it was dead silent.Y/n called out for Tommy but she got no reply.Her voice just echoed in the whole house.She walked here and there on the first floor in search for him but he was no where to be found.She was searching when she heard the sound of glass breaking.She ran upstairs where the sound came from.She ran and reached a room.She slammed opened the door to see Tommy sitting on the floor with blood in his hands.He shattered a glass and it was now everywhere.He was drunk.Y/n could smell cigarettes and whiskey
"Are you fucking crazy?!!!!"y/n screamed running up to him and grabbing his hand.Tommy didn't say anything and just watched her to so.She ran to his bathroom and brought a wet and dry towel.She walked back up to him and helped him sit on the bed.She took the towel and slowly cleaned his wounds.He winced but y/n blowed air to it slightly calming him down.She cleaned it and wrapped a bandage around it.She didn't stop panicking until the wound was clean.
"Tommy please don't do this to yourself okay?"she said putting the bandage back in the drawer.She turned to see Tommy lighting cigarette.She walked to him in anger and grabbed it and threw it away
"You are not smoking okay?You'll burn to ashes if u smoke so much!!"she growled
He again said nothing and just looked in her eyes.He didn't say anything the whole time because he was tired to fight.Y/n threw away his cigarette and walked over to him
"Okay Tommy get some rest please"she said getting the blanket and helping him lie down.
"I'll be right outside if you need me okay?Please just take some rest"y/n said tucking him in the sheet.He did nothing or said nothing except just stared at her.She met his gaze and never wanted to leave it.She looked in those icy blue eyes that a person could fall so easily into.She let out a breath and left his gaze and left the room.She needed some air so she stood on his balcony.She took a deep shaky breath.Nothing was going right at this time.She wasn't going to tell Tommy about anything regarding George it's better if he would be out of that.Y/n tried to keep herself together but she knew one day she would fall apart in pieces.She left the balcony and went to his room.She opened the door slightly to see Tommy sitting on his bed lookingoutside.Tommy smelled her cologne and looked over to the door.Y/n walked towards him and sat on the chair beside his bed.
"Tommy I need to tell you something"y/n said sighing
He looked in her eyes and nodded.
"I know everything is falling apart but I just don't want you to give up okay?No matter if you have me or not you have to stay strong even if I wouldn't be here or anyone else but please you have to stay strong for your family or grace"she said sighing
Tommy was confused as too why she was saying that.He knew something wasn't right.He knew she was hiding something big.Something that'a eating her from inside out.She took a breath and stood up to leave
"You're hiding something"Tommy said looking at the floor and then looking at her
She stopped in her tracks and turned around to see Tommy standing close to her.Her breath hitched a little but she shrugged it off.
"I'm not hiding anything from anyone"she said shaking her head slightly
"You are"Tommy whispered
Her beating got fast as too she was about to have a heart attack.He was really close to her and she could smell cigars and whiskey and a hint of men cologne.She felt lightheaded like she would fall
"Tommy I'm not hiding anything"she said turning around to grab the door knob and open the door but Tommy banged it close and pushed her back on it.He put a hand on her side so that she wouldn't go anywhere
"What are you hiding from me?"hw whispered almost growling
"I'm not fucking hiding anything"she growled back
Tommy wasn't going to give up that easily.He was tired of people who lied.He took her arms and pinned them above her head on the door.He brought his face closer to her.List filled the room immediately.It was like they were about to give up control.Y/n didn't even try to move an inch because she knew the outcome.
"Tommy please"y/n said closing her eyes.She didn't want this now.It wasn't correct.Him being close to her wasn't
He noticed how uneasy she looked and stepped back in realisation.She opened her eyes and looked at him.He looked at her too.Words never came out but it felt like they were talking through their eyes.Y/n took a breath and opened the door to walk outside.She loved him but she couldn't be close to him.Not like this and not now.Her breathing was getting disturbed and she was trying her best to get it back in pace.She closed her eyes and took in the air outside.The air was chilly and it was making her cheeks red.She turned back towards the house and saw Tommy standing outside leaning against the wall looking at her.A weird chill ran down her spine when she met with his gaze.She looked back in the front and took a deep breath.She heard footsteps coming closer to her and she soon enough felt his presence near her.
"We have to go to Brimingham dockyard"he said
"Why?"she asked plainly
"Meeting some guests"he said with his hands in his pockets
Y/n knew something was wrong.His voice sounded uneasy and weird.Not the usual cold voice he keeps.It sounded like he was hiding something like he was worried about something.She couldn't argue with him now she wasn't in the mood so she made sure she had her gun and she walked with him over to their cars.Just as they were about to get in arthur,John and Micheal came out of nowhere
"Going to the docks?"Arthur asked
"We're coming"John said putting his toothpick in his mouth and walking over to the car.Y/n took her car and Tommy sat in it while the brothers were in Tommy's car.Y/n really didn't want to be alone with Tommy now but at some point she wanted too.The ride was quiet.No one was saying anything.Y/n was thinking about how close Tommy got to her today.How they were breathing the same air and how she felt her body melting under his gaze.How he pushed her against the wall.
"No no shut up"she thought to herself
Her mind was blank again but not for long.She drove passed the same alleyway in which she was pulled.She remembered the deal she made with george.Her mind was so disturbed and her heart dropped when she remembered that.She felt uneasy and Tommy knew it.
"Are you okay there?"he asked looking at her
"I'm fine"she said not meeting his gaze
They soon reached the dock and it was empty.The weather became gloomy making the water look dark black.They were the only ones on the dock.Only the peaky blinders and y/n.They looked around a little to see no other person there.The howls of the wind could be heard everywhere.Y/n put a hand near her coat to make sure her gun was there.A sound of a thud came from the corner.They all looked over to see a group of armed men walking towards them.They all stood still.No one was able to recognise who they were except y/n.
"Shit"she whispered
Everyone looked at her.Her eyes were wide and she took out her gun.
"Who are they?"john asked
"Hughes men"Tommy completed
They all took out there guns ready to shoot.The group of men took their guns out to.Gunshots started in less than a second.A man came running at y/n but as expected she ducked and shot him right in the head.Another man came and y/n grabbed his gun and threw it in the water.She grabbed his head and banged it on the standing stick for trying ropes on the dock.Blood splattered everywhere.She took a breath and looked behind to see and of them shooting the men.Y/n saw John struggling with a man who was grabbing his neck.She ran up to him and yanked his arm of him and she grabbed her gun and shot him right in the middle of the skull.She looked over at Tommy who was kicking a guy hard on the chest.She saw a man running towards him behind
"Shit"she whispered and run towards him but was grabbed by a thug who punched her in the face causing her lip to cut from the edge and blood drip from her face.
"Son of a bitch"she hissed and kicked him making him fall on the ground.John and Arthur punched that guy till he gave his last breath.Y/n looked back behind to see the guy almost close to Tommy.
"Tommy look out!"y/n screamed
He looked over at her but it was late.The guy hit him hard on his head with the back of his gun.Tommy stood still but soon his body leaned and fell in the water.
"No no no!!!"y/n screamed and ran towards the end of the wood dock and dived in the water.The water was dark and nothing was clearly visible but she could see a body drowning.Y/n swam towards the bottom and could see Tommy clearly now.A slight sun ray fell on his face helping her to find him.Tommy was drowning fast.Everything was blurred to him and all he could see was an angel coming to hold him and then everything went black for him.Y/n finally got hold of his body and held him In her arms.The water was really cold making her dizzy.Her breathing was getting shallow but she had to get him out.She looked up and swam upwards.The water helped her a little to take his body upwards.Y/n was at an edge of her breath but she reached at the top.She let out a breath and Arthur heard it.He ran towards them and brought his hand forwards for her to grab.She swam towards him and he grabbed her arm.She let out a grunt and pulled Tommy upwards.She laid his body on the edge and looked at him.His eyes were closed and it looked like he wasn't breathing.
"No no no"she whispered and brought her ear on his chest.She heard nothing.Not a single heartbeat was heard.Her heart dropped and shattered again.She grabbed his chest and pushed on it trying to get him back.
"No tommy no!!"she screamed while still pumping his chest.He didn't respond to it.Y/n felt her world stop.The sound of Arthur screaming and John speaking were just mumbles now.She couldn't lose him he was everything she ever wanted.A tear dropped from her eyes.
"No"she whispered cupping his face with her hands
"No!!!"she screamed punching hard on his chest with all her strength.
"No"she said between her cries.She felt angry.He couldn't leave not now.She hit him on his chest again and she felt his body jerk.She stopped in her tracks.A cough was followed by it.She looked over to see Tommy coughing.He slightly got up and sat back to take support of the large stick.Y/n was dead in her tracks.Everyone was silent and were looking at him.Tommy opened his eyes to see y/n sitting with her clothes and hair wet and Arthur and John looking at him with wide eyes.
"What?"he said in his deep voice
Y/n slapped him on his face.
He said nothing
She let out a cry and hugged him tight.Warmth filled his cold heart.He hugged her back.
"You almost got us brother"Arthur said
Tommy tried to stand up and y/n helped him get up.He let out a groan and put his hands on his chest.
"Sorry for that"y/n said slightly embarrassed
She brought him up to the end of the dock and made him sit on the bench.Y/n finally took a look of the surroundings to see all the thugs bodies lying dead on the floor.She looked back at Tommy who was looking at her with a slight warm expression on his face(pic above)
Y/n gave him a slight smile.He looked closely at her lips.They were hurt but they still looked soft.He was giving up on his control and he just wanted to give in and kiss her.He looked at the cut on her lips and blood dripping from it.Her body was wet due to the water.Tommy was loosing focus and just wanted to feel her,kiss her,hug her.She brought her hand slightly up to his cheek and examined the cut he had on it.He never left her gaze and didn't even stop her.A bolt of current ran  through their bodies.A sudden burning feeling ran through their bodies.They both begged and prayed to have eachother.Tommy never told her but he wanted her since the first day he met her.He wanted her so bad.She traced her fingers through the cut slightly.He couldn't even feel the pain because she was there to stop it.She was everything he could ever ask for.And he realised it only now.