𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐒𝐄𝐂𝐑𝐄𝐓 𝐏𝐑𝐈𝐓𝐂𝐇𝐄𝐓𝐓- 𝐁𝐎𝐎𝐊 𝟏

Yard Sale!

"Jay, should I get rid of this"? Manny asked, he was dressed in a old brown blazer, a fishing hat and was carrying a cane, "The hat? The jacket? Or the Cane"? I laughed, "Actually...yes, just yes" Jay sighed. We were doing a yard sale, to raise money for UNICEF, but I was mainly doing it to see if we could raise more money than Miss Cooper's class so we can have a pool pizza party, Manny thinks that it's so we can learn about global altruism, it was for our social studies class, but I've seen that boy with  three slices of pizza. 

"Ugh, I hate garage sales, bunch of shady characters going through my stuff. Why can't I just write a check"? Jay whined, "Ay, relax, Jay" Gloria sighed, "It's just a couple of people in the drive way" I shrugged, "Yeah, yeah, yeah, that's where it starts, then it's, 'it's just a local call', Can I use your bathroom', 'My mother needs to lie down', no it just stinks" Jay huffed walking away. 

"He did write a check" I shrugged, "Shh, the less he knows the better" Gloria shushed me. People started to arrive, the Dunphy's except for Phil was here, "Remember everyone this is for charity, every dollar we make, helps a diseased child, a starving child, an abused child, now have fun"! Manny announced. Uncle Cam walked over, "Speaking of starving children, here is my contribution, six pairs of jeans that don't fit me anymore because I've lost twenty five pounds, that's like...one, two, three children's bowling balls" he smiled putting the jeans on the table everyone cheered and clapped. 

"Cam, are you really getting rid of all of these? I mean they're almost new, it's...well, what if you, um"? Mitch stammered, "What if I what Mitchell? Put the weight back on"? Uncle Cam questioned, "No! No, no, what if you-if you think of some creative art project that requires denim? you know something farm or Kelly Clarkson themed"? Mitch suggested, "I've already done so much with that motif" Uncle Cam mumbled, "Yeah...yeah-" Mitch began, "You know what? No, sell them! I wanna purge, which, for the record is not how I lost this weight"! Uncle Cam announced.

Mitch ran off with them, me and Luke chased after them, "whoa where do you think you're going with those"? Luke asked, "Oh, these aren't for sale" Mitch stated, "hey, this is for charity" I frowned, "You're taking those jeans out of the hands of some needy giant children" Luke added, "You know they're not actually getting the jeans"? Mitch stated, "Right, Luke"? I laughed looking at Luke. "Oh, right, then..." Luke began, "How about a donation"? I suggested, "twenty bucks"? Mitch questioned, "a hundred"! Luke smiled, "twenty" I laughed, "Sure, what's it to you if some kids get sick bathing in poo river, Africa"? Luke scowled, "Ew" Me and Mitch whined as Mitch passed me the twenty. 

I walked over to Jay, "How much for the ashtray"? A man asked holding one of Jay's old glass ashtrays. "I don't know, what's on the tag"? I questioned, "fifty cents, but there's a chip in it" The man shrugged, "Well, that's why it's lying on a blanket on my lawn, next to some old corn on the cob handles" Jay huffed. "I'll give you thirty five" The man sighed, "You're wearing a ten thousand dollar watch" Jay scoffed, "And you're whining over fifteen cents, you know the children in Africa-" I began, "You live in this place but you can't let go of that fifteen cents"? The man sassed, "Fine thirty five" I frowned, "Can you break a fifty"? The man smirked, "Get out" Jay huffed snatching the ashtray from the man.

Me and Manny were carrying out an old case from the attic, "Julie, what's this case doing here"? Gloria asked, "Oh, Manny found it in the attic" I shrugged, "Why, what is it"? Manny asked opening the case slightly before Gloria shut it with her foot. "Nothing that concerns you, either of you, it's from Colombia" Gloria stated, "But I thought you said-" I began, "You thought nothing" Gloria huffed, she closed the latches on the case, "It's going back in the attic and I want no more questions" Gloria ordered, "Why"? Me and Manny asked, "That is a question"! Gloria huffed as she walked off.