Accepted pain

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It's dark, but I see that I am back in my old home

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It's dark, but I see that I am back in my old home. Through the darkness of the night I can distinguish the familiar fournitures of the living room. The red couch with the empty beer bottles, the TV I never got to use under any circumstances, the dirty carpet that tries to light up the room with its bright colors. These contours are all imprinted in my mind.

I take a deep breath when I hear sudden footsteps right behind me. I am to slow to turn around so instead I take in the sudden punch that was thrown right at my stomach. I try to dodge the next punch that comes fling to my face, put once again I am too slow and his fist collides with my face. I intend to fight back, but my frail figure stands no chance against this drunken man and I know it. It's like a deadly circle I can't get out of.

I collapse to the hard ground and cover my head with my fragile arms when continued punches are thrown at me. And there I feel it again. The warm sticky liquid that peacefully slides down my skin. I feel like it always follows me everywhere I go, I get used to it and now it's accepted. An accepted pain.

"Magnolia" my foster dad yells at me, making his alcoholic breath reach my nostrils. Again and again he yells. Kicks. Punches. It doesn't stop. I get numb as the intense pain slowly starts to fade away.

"S-stop please." I beg while I try to cling to my painful stomach to make it stop.
He smirks at me before hovering over me with his massive body. I am struggling to breath as his hands reach my neck to squeeze out what's left out of my life. Tears fall. They hit the ground. I close my eyes.

"Lila..." a faint voice whispers somewhere fare away. I try to hold on a little longer, but I now I can't escape my faith. But...Wait. This is not my foster dad. This voice...

"Lila..." The smoothing voice whispers again, but a little louder. I try to think. I know this nickname. One person called me that. Only one person. But who ? Think Magnolia.

Comfort, safety, fun, sunshine are the words that accompany  this nickname. The only time I had these things were with with my brothers, especially Blake and... and Jace... but he never called me that.

"Lila...you're safe..." A now clear voice whispers against my ear and I suck in a deep breath as the grip of my foster dad on my throat is slowly released until it disappears. The images blur around me and I feel like I am being ripped away from the place.

That's when I wake up. I am safe. I am awake.

It was all a fake, but the pain I am feeling right now is just as destructive as in my nightmare. I let the tears fall as strong arms hold me gently in a protective way. It's Blake. He always used to call me Lila when we were still young and together. The one and only one. My Bee.

I grip my hands to his t-shirt and feel him relax just a little, but not enough to relieve all his tense muscles that are still holding onto me. But why is he here ? He hates me...

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