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I'm going crazy.
No I'm going insane.
Another coffee 'date' I should probably end this now right?
Truthfully i didn't know what went on in my mind when i said what i did.
I mean who would wanna date me? I'm just a widow who's cheating husband died.
Yeah the smart idea would be to end it now right?
I need to stop second guessing myself. Maybe I should focus on Meredith. Yea her and Derek not working out so well as she says maybe I should teach him a lesson instead of focusing on this coffee 'date.'
Ok it can't be that hard just let him down easy.
Or I could just suck it up and go on this coffee 'date' with him.
No, I'm not ready, I'm not ready, I can't do that, I just can't.
Ok I should probably just start with getting ready for work, I stink.
How am I gonna let him down? This is awkward conversation waiting to happen. He's gonna hate me.
Alright calm down it's just tomorrow morning nothing bad can come out of one morning I'm not even sure it's a date, he probably wants to be friends.
It would be disappointing. No stop, it wouldn't.
Maybe it's just men I mean who says I can't play for the other side. Am I right?
He's a good guy. I would probably destroy him, but Meredith told me he's a Hospital Whore. Which I think is impossible because he's been here for about 3 weeks. Then again if a lot can happen a day, a lot can happen in 3 weeks.
I mean if he is a 'Hospital Whore' per say I don't blame him, we need sex. Sex is Amazing doesn't matter with who.
Although I haven't had sex in more than 5 months I'm doing perfectly fine. People need sex but I don't need sex.
Omg what if he wants to have sex with me?
I mean who wouldn't.
I'm hot.
I don't know I'm really tired I should get some sleep even though I can't help but wonder if Mark Sloan wants to have sex with me.
I'll be fine and I won't cancel this coffee 'date'.
