All I Want (Capture Series 1)

Epilogue

"And then... that happened," Theo said while bowing his head.

I picked up a small plastic containing the broken glasses from the lens. There were small and big pieces of it, some were powder-like at the bottom. I felt them on my fingers through the plastic. Then, I gazed at the camera sitting inside the bag. I slowly put the small plastic back then picked up the camera. With every slide of my finger through the cracks of the camera, I felt like every pain Theo had all those years creep into my skin.

"I didn't mean to break it," Theo mumbled. "I was frustrated because I couldn't do any decent shots. I lost control and threw that across the room. The moment I saw them broken, my will for my passion completely vanished."

I reached for his hand and squeezed them lightly. He gave me a sad smile. I gave him an encouraging one.

"It's okay. Gaya ng lagi mong sinasabi sa akin, hindi mo kailangan humingi ng tawad o magpaliwanag tungkol sa kung anong nararamdaman mo," I told him.

"Sobrang nanghinayang lang kasi ako talaga. I treasured that lens the most but I broke it," he said.

I inhaled deeply to ease the pain building on my chest. I put the camera back in the bag and picked up the white envelope. I looked at Theo, asking for his permission to open it. He just nodded so I proceeded. It was the letter from the university in Canada.

I smiled at him. "What's yours is yours. Kahit ilang beses pang mawala sa'yo, kahit masira mo pa, kung para talaga sa'yo, it will find its way back to you," I said as I show him the letter kahit na alam kong nabasa niya iyon.

He smiled at me then reached for my face to give me a kiss on the forehead. "Your turn," he said as he pull away.

For us to be able to understand each other more, Theo and I decided to tell each other's story since the day we met to all the pains we experienced. Most of ours revolved around in this village and in school so we decided to go here in his house.

"Okay," I replied.

Binalik ko sa bag niya yung letter at camera at tumayo mula sa pakaka-upo sa sahig. Inabot ko sa kaniya ang kamay ko at agad niya naman iyong kinuha at tumayo na rin. I lead the way out of his bedroom to the room he made for me. Isang beses pa lang naman ako nakakapunta rito pero tanda ko pa rin kung saang pinto iyon. I could feel Theo's hand tightening around mine as I opened the door.

"God, it's dusty here," he muttered.

I chuckled. "You pointed that out already last time."

Inilibot ko ang tingin ko sa buong kwarto. Ngayon na umaga at mas maliwanag, kitang-kita ko kung gaano kaganda yung buong kwarto. The shelves mounted on the whole wall are white. The piano was painted beautifully with light grey color, with the gold cursive letter of my name. Beside it is the white desk and grey chairs.

"Noong nakita ko 'to, hindi ko alam kung matutuwa ako o malulungkot," I admitted. "Everything inside this room is perfect. Why didn't you tell me na may ganito rito sa bahay mo?"

"You weren't comfortable with the thought of us being alone in this house," he chuckled slightly then scratched the tail of his eyebrow. "Pinalagay ko lahat ng 'yan noong nakilala na kita nang maigi. I thought that since we were engaged, I should do something and make room for you here. Or maybe one day maisipan mo na tumambay dito, atleast may room ka."

I could feel my tears building up in my eyes because of the pain and love filling my heart.

"Sana sinabi mo sa akin para hindi nasayang 'tong effort mo," I cried.

He cupped both of my cheeks as he wiped my tears. "Nandito ka na naman e. Nakita mo na. Hindi na sayang."

I smiled at him through my tears. I nodded. "You're right," I said as I pulled my phone out of my pocket. Lumayo sa akin si Theo onti at tinignan kung anong ginagawa ko. "Manang? Yes po. Now na po. Salamat," I said then hang up.