You, You, You - I

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This is not my story,
Credit to the author.









"I wish I looked gayer."

Jennie looked at herself in the mirror. There was really nothing gay about her rather long fair hair, or summer dress. At least she had rainbow dangly earrings.

"Really, sweets? I think you look absolutely perfect." Jennie turned around to look at Jisoo who was lying across the bed, reading a book.

"You're not even looking," Jennie said grumpily and turned towards the mirror again. She could see Jisoo raising her head to glance at her quickly but then return to her book.

"Like I said," Jisoo continued, "you look perfect."

"Your friends are going to think I'm just a silly mormon girl," Jennie continued, "probably homophobic too."

Jisoo pushed herself into a sitting position, jumped off the bed and walked to stand right behind Jennie.

"And if they think so, they'll be wrong," Jisoo said and leaned her head on Jennie's shoulder. "We both know that you're as gay as they come. Completely woman crazy, that's what you are." Jennie chuckled and pushed her away.

"I wouldn't say I'm woman crazy," she said with a wide smile on her lips. She looked back to the mirror, she looked pretty but something was still missing. She went to her bag in the corner and took out her small jewellery box. After rummaging through it, she found her small CTR necklace. Choose the right. She sighed. She supposed that not everyone would agree that she was choosing the right. But in her mind and heart she was. Coming to stay with her friend Jisoo and the others over the summer had been one of the happiest time in her eighteen years. It hadn't made her faith weaker, it had made it stronger. Nothing about spending more time with Jisoo could be bad. That didn't mean she wasn't nervous about the party tonight. Especially when all Jisoo's much older friends would be there. Much older and very gay friends. Jennie really did feel quite terrified. Especially when she looked in the mirror again and compared herself to Jisoo.

Jisoo was gorgeous with straight black hair and in her tight black jeans and mint green t-shirt, her usually brown eyes almost glowed amber. Next to her, Jennie felt plain and ordinary. Maybe she should have looked for a couple of jeans as well. Maybe borrow some from Jisoo, which brought up a whole other level of excitement. The thought of going through Jisoo's closet, touching the fabric that was usually close to her body, probably still smelling like her... Jennie shook her head. No, she wouldn't go there. Jisoo could never see her that way, Jennie was sure of that. And she was in no mood to set herself up for heartbreak. Or ruin their friendship.

"You look wonderful, sweets," Jisoo said and playfully punched her arm, "we'll find you someone, don't you worry."

Jennie took one last look in the mirror and then went to close her bags and place them in the closet. It was going to be nice to stop living out of a suitcase in a couple of weeks, but Jennie couldn't be happy about the impending trip home. The thought of leaving Jisoo and their whole life in Aberdeen was too sad. But especially Jisoo.

"I'm not out to find someone," Jennie said as she moved her other bag too, "I'm just looking for having a good time."

"And what's a good time without a someone," Jisoo replied and laughed, "honestly, I think you'd like it if you just let loose a little."

Jennie smiled, she knew that Jisoo meant well.

"And when I do," she said, "I'll do it on my own terms."

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