thirteen. weightless

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You sit in the garden with Alastor, the roses as beautiful as the first time you came here with him. A shaky exhale leaves your lips and you rub the nape of your neck. The dress you've been in since the day before is growing suffocating and uncomfortable, your high heels discarded on the ground beside your feet.

Alastor stares at the roses, silent. His suit is a bit torn and tattered in places it wasn't before due to his demon transformation earlier. Your heart aches, having been silent since leading Alastor here. Despite the heavy burden off of your chest—so fucking much lifted off of your chest—there's one more conflict at hand.

Turning to Alastor you catch him gazing at you. You inhale deeply and grab his hand with a gentleness. He smiles in a weak manner while looking at you. "I love you, Alastor. I always have and I'm certain I always will.",you say with a bit of a shaky voice. You don't want to start crying again but this is already difficult.

Alastor raises your hand and plants a gentle kiss against your knuckles. "And I love you, Y/N. Forever and always...",he says in a soft tone while lowering your hand. You smile sadly and squeeze your eyes, interlacing your fingers with his and trying to compose yourself.

"I can't be with you Alastor...",you say in a voice just above a whisper. Looking to him and meeting his gaze, you blink back softly. "I came here...for redemption because I want to see Theodora. Now with everything out in the open—no secrets...I feel I can finally follow the pure path. I'm sorry, my love but I can't indulge with you."

Alastor blinks rapidly and fixes his cracked monocle with a soft nod. He's silent for a few moments before exhaling shakily. With a gentle squeeze of your hand he smiles at you. "I will be here to support you the entire way, my love...but promise me one thing?",he asks with softness. His other hand reaches out and cups your cheek gently.

He catches a tear that slips with his thumb. You nod for him to continue and he leans in, his hand gently pulling you towards him. Tilting your head and squeezing his hand, his lips press against yours and your eyes squeeze shut. Feeling his lips against yours makes you feel the happiest you've felt in so long.

You both part your hands to grab at one another, desperately clinging to the other. Your tears meet on your tongues, the taste salty and bitter but the sweetness of the kiss outweighs that. His hands grasp either side of your face, pulling you as close as he can get you. Your hands bunch in his suit, pulling him as close as he can get to you.

Fireworks explode inside of you and complete warmth fills you. Kissing him feels so right, it feels like Heaven and everything good about the world.

When your head gets dizzier you pull away and he leans his forehead against yours. Both of you breath heavily and he swipes away your tears. Resting against one anothers forehead with your eyes shut, you both sit in silence for a few moment. Heavy breathing the only sounds in your ears. The rest of Hell seems so far and distant.

Alastor swallows hard and he plants another kiss against your lips, this one brief. "Promise me...that—that if—if this redemption does not work out...promise me that you will take my hand there. Promise me you'll marry me...just like we always planned."

Pulling away from his forehead you open your eyes to see his pinky out. You giggle softly and wipe away your tears that refuse to stop falling. Meeting his gaze, you loop your pinky with his and nod. "Of course, my love. I promise...",you smile sadly at him.

You pull your hand away and sniffle, cleaning up your cheeks and wiping your nose with your sleeve. "Tell me about her..." Turning to Alastor with threaded up brows he smiles at you, looking to your stomach before meeting your gaze again. "I know what I said...many decades ago but—but when you told me we had a child...I don't think I have ever experienced such euphoria...well other than the day you accepted my proposal."

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