Pair of kings

Give me some morphine

Harry's POV

"You look awful Haz" Snig said while I'm sipping a tea still in my pajamas.

Why wouldn't I be awful? I probably didn't sleep at all. I'm just a living dead body now. My curls is everywhere. I didn't bath for two days. I didn't like it myself but I just don't want to move because I don't know.

"Thanks" I said coldly and continue sipping my coffee. Snig sighed, hold my knees.

"How's Zayn?"

"Nothing much that I know." I clicked my tongue and looked at the floor.

"What you mean by that?"

"How would I know? Am I even belonged at this house? I feel like I'm alone here. My mom took my little angels because I can't process no shit" I groaned and put my tea cup away.

"When's the last time you talked to him Harry?"

"Four days back"

"You need to talk with him Harry"

"I am ready to talk but he's not"

"Just try tonight kay,since you both will alone all the time except when Yaser is here. By the way, how's he?"

"Dad is doing fine although he's drinking quite a lot. But still I know he tries to find better solution. I did talk to him, so don't worry"

Just at that time Zayn came out of the room after four days. I looked at him and he's nothing like me. He's cleaned probably just got a bath and he's so fresh. Just looking at him my eyes becomes too fresh for my own liking. He looked at me and no emotions gotten.

I felt my heart panged and looked away. "Hye Zayn, how ya doing?" Snig inquiries.

"Good, ya?"

"I'm good too."

"Have ya eaten any?"

"Yeah, Harry made me some tea"

I looked back at him and said, "I made for you too"

He didn't even looked at me and said, "I have my own hands, don't I?"

His actions seriously pissed me off. I got off from the couch and stomped my way to him.

"What were you thinking? Am I a fucking asshole or slut or slave? Why you doing this to me!"

"I didn't say that" he said coldly and add on some hot water in his new make tea still not looking at me.

"Then what the fuck is wrong now?! Look at me asshole" I growled. He looked at me finally with no emotions.

"Uhm, I let you guys alone, bye" Snig said and disappeared.

"Tell me! What is wrong? Why are you avoiding me? You probably don't need me, but you don't realise I need you is it? You're not the one who lost someone!  I lost too, I lost my mother in law who treats me like her son. I know the pain Zayn! More than you do! I've lost my dad when I was 6, just 6! But I always thank God because I got to spend at least 6 years with him. That's how it works. Some doesn't have mom nor dad. So, remind yourself that we are lucky enough to have one of them by our side." I said crying for the third time now.

"Just stop Harreh! It's not the same" he said breaking the eye contact.

"Yes, it's not the same. I lost my dad in a car accident where he was coming back to my school to give my stupid lunch which I left. I was the reason he died! Nothing hurts more when you the one who kill the person you love the most" I sniffled and this time his face turn soft.

"I'm sorry" he said and embrace for a hug but I stopped him. As much as I need his compassion, I need explanation first.

"Explain first, I need the reason. It's okay if it hurts me. Just the truth"

"I realize I lose everything I love. That's why I stayed away from you, our kids,our dad,our friends and literally everyone."

"What about just now?"

"I-i dreamt about mom and she said what I'm doing is wrong but still I couldn't believe her and i-i just couldn't speak to you"

"You're wrong Zayn, in every perspective. You're her son, who she earns after she met your father. Did you think about your father Zayn? Did you know how much he needs your hug during your mom's funeral? He was devastated. He's faking everything. He's drinking nonstop. He's looking for your love Zayn. You probably don't understand. Imagine I died and you will be so devastated. What you need the most at those times? Someone who understands you, and that person is our children. You will be convinced that there's life even after the love of your life died. He needs to hear it Zayn"

He slammed his lips on mine and I responded back. I seriously miss this. How our lips lock. I thought I will forget how his lips shaped. I don't think I will forget that. NEVER.

He broke the kiss and we both gasped for air. " Don't ever talk about you dying. I couldn't take it" he whispered with glassy eyes.

"But that's how everything works. If I dead, move on and find someone else."

"No way!"

"Why?"

"Will you do the same if I died?"

"No"

"Then don't ask me to move on"

I sighed, "Fine. Just remember Zayn. Cherish the present because it will become memories one day." I said stroking his cheek.

"I'm sorry babe. For everything. I was being childish"

I embrace him in a hug, " it's okay babe. Just let me talk next time"

"I'm sorry"

I hugged him tightly and one question was playing in my head. Does he still loves me?

"I love you Zayn" I said and my heart was pounding nonstop. It's like I could get anxiety because it's so intense.

"I love you forever Harreh" he said grabbing my waist and kiss my forehead.

I was crying like I got proposed. I layed my head on his chest and just listen to his heartbeat. Just at that time, Dad came in. By the look, I know he's drunk.

"Zayn, lead him to his bed. We need to talk with him tommorow. I have some stuff to say" I smile smally.

Zayn stabilised his dad and took his to his bed. All the time Yaser was blabbering something but I couldn't catch it. How am I supposed to catch it when their normal speaking accent is thick. I decided it would be nice to take a long shower. Finally,I have a hope that it will be alright for us.

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Hyee guys! Sorry for updating late babes. I was kinda busy and depression isn't helping me. So, here we go! New chapter to enjoy. I will try my best to update faster like I used to. Thanks for still sticking with me. Stay safe and I love you guys.

~Love J 💛💚