Butter Pecan (SasuNaru)

Fairy Bread

Dull and uninspiring.

Completely colorless and tiresome.

A lack of bright, flashing fireworks.

That's what it felt like when her lips touched mine. The opposite feeling that I get when I kiss Sasuke. Time virtually stops when my lips lock with his. It feels like there's a rush of overwhelming passion shooting straight through me and coursing through my veins. That same force compels me to run my fingers through his silky black hair and steals hushed moans in the process of it all, painting my whiskered cheeks with a red hot crimson.

I miss kissing him.

In fact, I miss everything about Sasuke. It's been much too long since I've been able to graze my fingers down his structured abs and press my lips against his milky white collar bone. I miss his possessive touch when he traps me in his large bear hugs, embracing me with that comforting warmth of his. I've even dreamt about seeing him smile again with those cute dimples indented on each cheek, accompanied by Sasuke's deep and loving voice. Everything and more; I miss it all.

Sometimes I wonder if Sasuke misses me as much as I miss him. If he loses himself thinking about the way I used to talk and kiss him. Is he hoping that I return to him one day? Is he sitting in solitude at home, completely null of emotions because of how hopeless things are now? Is Miko-chan even there to support Sasuke along the way? I worry about this all the time, and it only makes me want to see him sooner. It makes me work even harder than before, somehow.

Ever since Sakura kissed me that day, it's been harder and harder to keep up appearances in front of my family. I remember telling Sakura that I didn't love her at all and that my heart belonged to Sasuke. She burst into tears right on the spot, sobbing about how I didn't return her feelings and how miserable it's going to be to marry someone who doesn't love her. Thus, to keep Sakura cooperating with me, I told her that I would try to fall in love with her. Needless to say, I was lying, but Sakura seemed to believe it.

That was my first mistake, though, because Sakura started to demand intimate things on a daily basis. She wanted me to kiss her every morning at school and every afternoon after school. She would invite me over to her house and try to force sex on me, which I always would find a way to refuse. She would even purposely put herself in provocative poses and situations to try and sway me into doing it with her. It was all too much.

But, I started thinking, if this is the only way to be with Sasuke, I must put everything on the line. I must act like I'm head over heels with Sakura to get her to play the part in front of my parents perfectly.

Even if that means...

...even if... that means...

No! I absolutely refuse to do anything sexual with Sakura. That would make me unfaithful to Sasuke. I could never. He would think I was repulsive, in that case.

I guess I'm just going to have to avoid anything intimate as best I can till my parents decide to trust me. But honestly, this is getting a bit tiring. I wish I could just tell Sakura my plan with Ino but she would never be on board. All she wants is the money from our marriage, and, apparently, my heart. I keep telling Ino to come up with ways to make Sakura loath me, but she's too busy with work to even talk for a small moment.

This whole thing is a mess. It's only been a few months and I'm already mentally exhausted. I don't even know if Sasuke left overseas yet and I have no way to check. In fact— I have to check!

Gosh, I'm so stupid. Now I'm wondering if all this effort has been done for nothing because Sasuke could already be long gone by now.

Hinata already tried to go to his home, but the yellow tape prevented her from approaching the doorstep. It seems like even nearing the house is strictly forbidden. How could I possibly check? My parents took away my phone ages ago and I haven't memorized anyone's phone number. The only phone number I have is...