Because You're Worth It | Jeon Wonwoo

thirty

I wanted to know everything, yet I was the only one who wanted it, therefore I will realize everything alone. I don't know why, but I feel like everything's unreal, but there's still this part of me that's telling that this is what I'm used to.

I'm torn between asking her or just analyze everything by myself, but by just thinking about it, it's just a sting in the head. She did tell me some things, but they weren't enough, they weren't explained enough. And if I would take the short cut to knowing everything; the only way is to ask her.

I deeply inhaled as I grabbed the book beside me, momentarily shifting all my attention to it, just to atleast give my brain a break from these constant running thoughts.

But when I wasn't even halfway a page, I heard her voice. "Good morning!"

I tend my eyes to her from the book and smiled. It was a bit unsual for her to wake up early when she has a lot of time for herself to still sleep, but it wasn't that bad seeing her awake before I go.

"You're up early.", I put aside the book that I just read, and placed all my attention to her.

"Can't you not go to work today?", She expectantly raised her brows at me, but however, I could feel my forehead creasing. It was unusual for her to ask me to take a leave from work as well.

"Why?", I asked, and she gave me the I-don't-know-look but it was clearly evident that she was aware of everything she's saying.

"Let's go somewhere fun.", Her tone of voice went higher as she implored.

"Can't we move it to the weekend?", I suggested, but she just pouted in return.

"Please?"

I seriously don't mind spending most of my days and hours with her, but work is an exception, right? I mean, we have to live.

I looked out the window, and the weather looked exceptionally perfect today.

"The weather is great today.", I unconsciously uttered, as I diverted my attention back to her. Like the weather outside, she looked perfect standing there, the sunlight streaming from the window, shined just right on her face.

Just now, I still had thoughts of convincing her to move her plan to the other days, but it all just went away as I dazed at her, and everything about her in general tempted me to follow along to her lead.

I've never loved staring at someone before, but she was an exception, her presence alone gives me so much adrenaline that I wanted it to last forever, if it would happen to be possible.

"So we're going?", Her voice was the realization I needed to snap out of my daydream.

She was just looking at me with an expectant look, but we all have that kind of moment when we want to feel someone's physical touch. And so, I grabbed her wrist and made her sit on my lap. I couldn't help but sheepishly smile by how flustered she was and by how she got close to my face.

I was holding back, I swear.

"If you really want to, then we'll go.", And that's how I concluded that I have already given up on changing her mind.

Her face brightened along with a smile. "Really?", I nodded. "Yes!!"

But as some seconds went by, it showed that she got nervous, by the way she cleared her throat and awkwardly looked elsewhere, I was completely convinced.

I quietly snickered. "Why do you suddenly wanna go and hang out?", I asked, and immediately, her eyes found it's way back to mine.

"N—No reason.", She just said, and it contrasted to her tone of voice. Judging from her face, It felt like she wanted to say something but she was contemplating, and there's something holding her back.