Bad Boy: Daniel Hart

thirty-one

Unedited

Today was harder to get up then most. I hadn't slept, maybe thirty minutes in the very early hours of the morning, but I was shattered out of it by a mind-numbing nightmare that had carved its way into my mind. It was already 6:34 in the morning, I should be getting ready for school, but my body won't move.

Cemented in place, I look up to my ceiling looking over the different swirls and patterns that covered it. Anything to take my mind off what today is. Rylee already knew school wasn't on my agenda today, I gathered that from the message she sent me at six.

Rylee: Remember I'm only one call away today. My thoughts are with you, I love you.

I read it over and over again and still, can't muster up the energy to reply. She helps me so much and I can't make the effort to talk to her, some friend I am. I immediately take myself out of the mind-set, reaching over to grab my phone and call Rylee. She picks up almost instantly.

"Hey babe," She sighs, I can feel her sympathy through the phone.

"Hey, I just wanted to say thank you, for the message. It means a lot to me," I say.

"You know I've always got you, even if you have Mr. Sexy to fall onto now," she joked, I laughed at her nickname for Dan. 

"You know you're always my number one." I chuckled softly, I could hear Rylee reciprocate the laugh on the other end. 

"I know I am, -"there was a slight pause before she spoke again, "I've just realised we're on a call and you can't see me, but I just winked then." She said, I couldn't contain my laughter, rolling my eyes at her gesture. Typical Rylee.

"You really are something else," I could feel the weight being lifted off my chest just by talking to her.

"I know." A stagnant silence filled the air around us, I didn't know what to say...I never knew what to say. This day felt different, and I know it's because the one who I relied on most isn't here. "Will you be okay?" Rylee's soft voice came through.

"I think so, I'll call you if I need you okay?" I said, really needing to be alone with my thoughts today.

"Of course. I love you!" She tells me, making sure I know.

"I love you too, Ry." We exchanged a quick goodbye.

I let a few moments pass before making the decision to get out of bed and see where my dad was but, was shocked when I found the house was completely empty with his car no-where in sight on the drive. I walk into the kitchen, where I find a small, scribbled note attached the fridge.

Sadie,

At the office until 3 today, was given a short shift. I've bought some spaghetti, thought we could have dinner at 4:30? I'll be out for a few hours tonight, Scott has invited me. 

Love Dad x

Sighing, I crumpled up the piece of paper. I knew something would happen; I just didn't want to believe it. I can't be mad though, at least he's still asked to see me and have dinner which is one up from how I thought I would be spending this day. Alone.

I went to the sofa to collect my thoughts. Images of what should have been and what could have happened ran through my head, teasing me. I picture Gee sat here beside me, telling me everything will be okay, she would be so proud of who you are becoming. Would she? Would she be proud to know that her daughter is an emotional wreck, surrounded by nothing but grief and loss?